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Monday, December 29, 2008

Minions #143 - How do you spell Xmas?



Stand by, following some new commercial jibber-jabber for a body-shot from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your government bail-outs to the nearest Minion and we'll continue doing things as we always have because, hey, that's been working for us so far, right?


NEW! SUPPORT "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY!

We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Later, we'll be adding a selection of Minion-recommended merchandise, but until then, use your imagination. Books, videos, electronics, games, maybe even ACTION FIGURES!
Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Naughty is as naughty does!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

Greetings, New Years Deresolutions!

Yes, one more swipe at Christmas before we move on to the new year. I finally got a half-way decent Santa, sort-of-in-scale, so I had to make use of him while I could.

You know, sometimes when you're doing a strip like this, you just don't know if what you're doing is funny, or terrible, or in horrid taste, or what. This is one of those occasions. Well, what I've learned is, go with it. Usually somebody will really like it, and the rest will usually forget it soon enough.

Go ahead. Start forgetting!

Other Reports from the Lair

Over the holidays, Mrs. Minion Master and I have been on a James Bond marathon. We now own all the Bond movies on DVD, except for Quantum of Solace (which will be added soon enough), the comedy version of Casino Royale from the 60s (which hardly counts to my mind) and the "unauthorized" Never Say Never Again (the non-Eon remake of Thunderball starring Sean Connery, released about the same time as the Roger Moore "Octopussy.")

A liquidator-type store near us got on a bunch of what were apparently anniversary releases from 7-8 years back. While the current Bond DVD releases are stripped down, these have tons of excellent documentaries, supporting material, and other extras, and they were priced at a too-good-to-pass-up $4.99 each. I got a couple, and before long, a couple more, and before we knew what we were doing, we had the whole danged set.

From a Minions at Work standpoint, it's been great to see all the villains, gadgets, and lairs again. I'm thinking about reviewing some of the films from a lair/overlord/minion-centric perspective. The best lair to my mind is still the volcano from "You Only Live Twice," but there are plenty of other great ones.

It's also interesting to check out the minions and their uniforms. Best dressed have got to be the painted-on red jumpsuits with black belts (on all-female minions) in "Octopussy," but there are other good ones, like the color-coded minions from "You Only Live Twice." Then there are a few that are terrible to behold. Yeah, I've got to blog about that here at some point.

Anyway, we're off to Florida in a couple weeks, but while watching Bond films, I built some interesting new set pieces, and there should be plenty of new cartoons to see us through the traveling.

Keep sharing the link with your friends! We've got a world to take over here!

- Goldblogger Steve

- Your Mastersaurus Rex, Steve

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Holiday Bonus Minions #142 - Making the List



Hey, folks, a holiday bonus Minions at Work!

I know times are hard, and the weather's not much better for a lot of you, but chin up! Better times are ahead!

All of us here at the Lair: your Minion Master, Steve, Mrs. Minion Master, Chris, the Cats-O-Evil Oz and Sydney, as well as all the Minions and Overlords, wish you and yours a happy holiday (of whatever flavor or flavors you choose to celebrate), and a safe and prosperous New Year!

- Steve

Monday, December 22, 2008

Minions #141 - The Gift that Keeps on Giving



Stand by, following some new commercial jibber-jabber for a body-shot from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your government bail-outs to the nearest Minion and we'll continue doing things as we always have because, hey, that's been working for us so far, right?


NEW! SUPPORT "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY!

We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Later, we'll be adding a selection of Minion-recommended merchandise, but until then, use your imagination. Books, videos, electronics, games, maybe even ACTION FIGURES!
Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

Greetings, Gift Rappers!

If you haven't been here since last week's cartoons, check the couple of posts in-between now and then for some fun and news you missed. I've been doing some work here, making some changes, and getting ready for some travel next month.

As mentioned above, if you click on our link before making purchases at Amazon.com, it will do a lot (well, a little, but every bit helps) towards supporting Minions at Work. It costs a lot to keep the lights on here, what with buying new figures and props, lighting, domain registration, and just time. My goal this year is to more actively promote the site, increase our traffic, and make it self-supporting, and that's going to be a challenge with the economy as it is.

But hey, I know that many of you, my loyal followers, are suffering too. That's why we'll be here each week trying to bring a smile into your tortured, minion-like existence. We're all Minions on this bus, and we'll get through these hard times together.
Of course, if it comes down to you or me, I'm going right over the top of you. That's just the way it is.

Anyway, that's it for this week, but keep your eyes open for new changes and updates.

- Your Mastersaurus Rex, Steve

Saturday, December 20, 2008

More Housekeeping and a Heroes List!

Another housekeeping post. Blogger has been making some improvements that allowed me to cut some clutter out of the Mighty Sidebar. Same content, just now you can click on pictures and banners as links, rather than my having to put a separate text link below them.

I've been neglecting the sidebar lately. Haven't had a new rock-band name in a while, and the Incomplete Evil Overlord list had been getting stale. Still no new band names. I'll get on that. But lots of new entries in the Evil Overlord list.

And speaking of lists, I discovered the other day that someone has done a Heroes List to be a companion to the infamous Overlord list. You can click to them from here, but I've put permanent links in the sidebar as well.

Oh, also in the sidebar is a new book cover, the cover for "Swordplay," a fantasy anthology that will be out in June. It features 17 new stories about swords, including yet another new short story by your humble host, me.

I'm hoping to get things set up soon so that we'll be part of the Amazon affiliate program, so's you can help support Minion at Work by buying our books (and your other Amazon purchases) using our links. I'll let you know how that works out.

Okay, that's about it. Chris and I are going to Florida next month to speak at the Space Coast Writer's Conference, so I'm busy building up an inventory of cartoons to use while we're busy traveling. There shouldn't be any interruptions in your Minions schedule. But it's tricky. I'm shooting a whole series of cartoons on a bar set, but I have to finish and tear that set down before I can set up and shoot the cartoon that should appear Monday.

Logistics. It's all part of the Evil Plan.

- Steve, Your Minion Master

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Merry Fringemas

I don't usually do this sort of thing here, but if you've been missing the new series Fringe, you're missing a literal mad-science treat. This isn't a perfect show, but I don't miss an episode, especially to see what character Walter Scott (who narrates this video) will do next. Be warned, this video (and the show) are about as gruesome as TV standards will allow. In fact, this whole thing would be far too grim and gross for my taste without the ongoing dark-comic relief provided by Walter's character. Just when it's all too much to take, Walter will say something like:

"The only thing better than a cow, is a human. Unless you want milk. Then you need a cow."

or


"There is nothing I enjoy more than taking drugs...perhaps administering them."

Anyway, if you're tuning in late, this gives you a quick (and amusing) recap.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Overlords #140 - Bar Joke



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Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a body-shot from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a message of real change from your Maverick Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

Greetings, Minion Bar-flies!

This week, in honor of -- I dunno, a round number maybe -- I decided to bring the Overlords back, though in a completely different way. In fact, pretty much everything is different this week. Minions at Work sets tend to be bright and monotone. This one is dark and colorful. And of course, no Minions in sight.

Frankly, I just love bar sets, though I must confess that your Minion Master doesn't spend much time in the real thing. I rarely pollute my magnificent brain with alcohol, and never have. Not a big moral choice or anything. It's just the way I am.

But as I get older, I find I enjoy going with friends to a bar just to watch people. Same with going to Las Vegas, something I never figured I'd enjoy. Going to Las Vegas is like going to the giant mother-of-all-bars, one with no walls, one that never closes.

People do things in those surroundings that they'd never do in their real life. And while you might think it's the alcohol or the lack or restrictions, I think it's something different entirely. It's just that, in this one situation, they have an excuse to let a little of their real self show through.

Which is why it's fun to put the Minions, or the Overlords, in that situation. You find out who they really are behind the facade.

It amuses me that Doctor Coldblood and Doctor Head-in-a-jar go to bars together, even though they apparently don't like each other. I think it's just because nobody else wants to party with them. The unpopular people have to stick together. They don't get to pick and choose. The decision's been made for them.

But do these two really dislike each other as much as they let on? I've got to wonder. Maybe we'll learn more in future cartoons.

Save me a place at the bar. Seen you next time.

- Your Minion Mixologist, Steve

Monday, December 08, 2008

Minions #139 - Hunger Strike



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Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a heart-shot from your Minion Master!

Man, am I getting morbid lately, or what? Actually, I was more going for silly. Laughing at the reaper, that's me.

Actually, this is one of those cases where I put the set together first, and came up with the joke later. Actually, it isn't much different that a lot of sets you've seen lately, except for one important thing: the door.

Oh, sure, you've seen this set before. But I've been on a binge of building some new modular set pieces, and I decided to make a wall module with a doorway cut into it.

See, you've seen the door lots of times, but you've never seen it open, and you've never seen anything behind it, for an important reason. In the past, it's always just been stuck up against a blank wall, with some black foam behind the window to make it look dark back there. Actually, once or twice, you've seen a hand reaching out from between the bars, but in those cases, that's all there was. A hand.

eeeeww!

So this time, there was actually a space behind the door to put an actual prisoner. I kind of like how you can just see his eyes lit behind the bars.

And, oh yeah, I just built that silver ventilator unit in the foreground. Stuck that in there too.

Like you care. I slave away, building new stuff for the Lair, and do I get a "thank-you," maybe some flowers, or a box of candy. No.

For that, I will destroy your puny world!

But not for a while. It's where I keep my stuff.

(Apologies to the Tick)

See you next time...if you're lucky!

- Your Minion Target-master, Steve

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Minions #138 - Terminated Employment


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Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a generous severance package from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a few words of comfort from your Minion Master.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores. Or, just name us in your will, and take up dangerous hobbies like crocodile-pit bungee-jumping or sky-diving with a sheet. It's just that easy!

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)



Greetings, Minion Mourners!


You know, when I came up with this week's cartoon, it was before last week's unfortunate "Black Friday" trampling death of a temporary Wal-Mart employee by a mob of bargain-hunting yahoos. Because, you know, that would have been in even worse taste than usual.

But it does serve as a reminder that those who work in retail, especially at this time of year, are our Minion brothers and sisters. They too toil thanklessly for their Evil Overlord Masters. Working long hours for low pay and little or no benefits is bad enough. Nobody should lose their life over it.

So a moment of Minion silence for our fallen fellow, and our sympathy to his family.

And for the millions of other Retail Minions out there, a salute to you too.

For those of your reading, I hope each of you will think of this, and cut them a little extra slack through this holiday season. A smile or a kind word might go a long way towards making their day suck just a little less.

Where does he get those wonderful toys?

I had an email from a reader Phil M. the other day, asking where we get all the cool props that we use in our Minions at Work photo shoots. I thought the answer might interest other readers as well. But on the other hand, that's not everyone's cup of poison tea, so rather than answering here, I put an illustrated post on my hobby-blog, One-Sixth. You can find the post here.

That's it till next time.


- Your Minion Undertaker, Steve.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Minions #137 - Quiet Riot



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a generous severance package from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a message of real change from your Maverick Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)


Greetings, Livid Bruises!


Here we are again. Some weeks I just get tired of the Minions just sitting and standing around. Every once in a while it's good to put some action into things. I don't know how funny this is, but it does have action!

Speaking of action, here's a little plug for another action-figure-photo-comic that I enjoy. Alien Loves Predator has recently returned from a hiatus. It's the story of what happens when two single, male, aliens share an apartment in New York. Be warned, this strip often isn't office or family-friendly, and it has something to offend everyone. But it makes me laugh on a regular basis, and I'm glad to have it back. If you're up for it, check it out here.

By the way, I noticed a couple of new things on my Blogger control panel. Turns out, Minions at Work has followers! Actually, this is a new feature that makes it easier to follow your favorite blogs (like this one, natch), and as a bonus, you can get your little icon to appear on blogs that have the proper widget installed. So I've installed one here. Look for it in our sidebar, and just click the link there if you'd like to add yourself as a follower.

For those of you in the U.S., have a happy Thanksgiving. For the rest of the world: suck it up, dudes. Just another week. Either way, see you next time...


- Your Minion Man of Action, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Sure, Halloween is over, but don't let the fun end there!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Minions #136 - Suspended Employment




Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a generous severance package from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a message of real change from your Maverick Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)


Greetings, Surplus Manpower!


On time two weeks in a row! How soon can we get lazy and start coasting again?

Anyway, here we are with another one of those pesky "topical" cartoons. You know what that means. Just apply where it hurts until the pain goes away.

Or something.

Well, listen, we've got things to do and plots to hatch this week, so I'm going to cut it short. See you next time.

- your Terminator at work, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Sure, Halloween is over, but don't let the fun end there!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Minions #135 - Spoilage



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for some recycled, hybrid, carbon-neutral words from your Minion Master!

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Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a post-election message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)


Greetings, Curb-side cast-offs!


Ha! I'm back on time again! Don't get used to it!

Busy week here at at Lair, as Mrs. Minion Master Chris and I have gotten the chance to pitch some novels based on one of our favorite television shows, one that should be familiar to Minions-fans (fingers crossed, but no details until, and if, we get a go-ahead). Chris is buried trying to finish the second in her series of plumbing-themed mystery novels (coming soon from Berkley Prime Crime).

And we just got invited to speak at the Space-Coast Writer's Conference, to be held late-January in Cocoa Beach, Florida. Yes, I love our secret hide-away on the Oregon coast, but can I be persuaded into going to sunny Florida in the middle of winter? Why yes, I can!

Lots of other things in the work, but nothing I can talk about yet. Seems like now that the elections are over, the publishing world is suddenly moving again. Huzzah!

- your Secret Master of Fundom, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Sure, Halloween is over, but don't let the fun end there!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Minions #134 - Quality Work Environment



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for some mental-health adjustment from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a post-election message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)


Greetings, Residents-of-a-world-where-there's-a-black-president-of-the-United-States-so-it-must-be-the-future-now-just-like-24-oh-no-now-they-have-a-WOMAN-president-there!


Okay, I'm late this week. Busy with a proposal on a cool potential writing project (a tie-in novel to a TV show that I love, and should be great fun if approved by the powers-that-be), and distracted by the elections.

Plus, Paint Shop Pro locked up Saturday just as I was finishing the edit. Yes, your dumb Minion Master had failed to save as he worked. So I had to carve out time to do it all over again from scratch. Lots of signs and graphics in this one, so it took a while.

Yes, it may seem like I'm getting lazy here. I do need to get myself more excited and inspired (your comments really help in this department), but I'm far from losing interest in the Minions. In fact, I just renewed the "MinionsAtWork.com" domain for another two years (more money down the Minion-hole), so I guess I'm committed. (Or is that, I SHOULD be committed?)

See you next week, maybe even on time.

- your long-suffering Master, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Just in time for Halloween! Buy a bunch of copies and corrupt all the little witches and warlocks that show up at your door!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Minions #133 - Start Bailing



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for some calming reassurances in this time of crisis from your Minion Master!

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Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two in a designer dress and librarian-glasses and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Victims of Circumstance!


AHHHH! AHHHHH! PANIC! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! CASH OUT WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR 401K AND INVEST IT IN TULIP BULBS AND CANNED GOODS! HURRY! FOR GOD'S SAKE HURRY!

Oh.

Wait.

Was I supposed to say something calming?

I don't often hit on current events, but since this gave me an excuse to reuse one of my all-time-favorite Minions at Work images, I couldn't resist. (I've got another scene set up at Minions Studios that I had intended to post, but maybe you'll get it later in the week as that make-up cartoon I've been promising.)

Anyway, we're all just Minions in this great nation of ours, and rule number one of being a Minion is, you really don't have any control anyway, so there's no sense in panicking. Just adopt a zen-like state of calm, go to your inner Happy Place, and try to hold onto the handrail so the blast doesn't blow you off the catwalk and into the yawning abyss.

See? Isn't that better?

- your helpful Minion Master, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Just in time for Halloween! Buy a bunch of copies and corrupt all the little witches and warlocks that show up at your door!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Minions #132 - Shoot em' Up




Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, NRA Liberals!


We're mostly back from our computer crash, though I'm terminally behind on everything, thus the lateness. I still hope to have a make-up cartoon for you soon.


Moving on... Yeah, I know I've been pushing the new anthology "Enchantment Place," with a story by Mrs. Minion Master, Chris, pretty hard. I let up next week, but only because there's a new anthology with another story by Mrs. Minion Master out! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Just in time for Halloween! Buy a bunch of copies and corrupt all the little witches and warlocks that show up at your door!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Minions #131 - Deep End



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Back-seat Drivers!


We've finally progressed far enough with recovering from the computer crash to edit and post a new cartoon. More soon as I try to make up for the two Mondays we missed.

Between recovering data from the crashed hard-drive, transfering it to the new machine, and migrating from XP to Vista (necessitating some software upgrades, including a new version of Paint Shop Pro, the photo editor we use, it's taken a lot longer than I thought.

As of this moment, the new computer is still sitting on the living room floor hooked up to our big TV, but I hope to pull out the old computer and move it into the office tonight or tomorrow morning. Then we can get a little more back to business as usual.

- Missing Minion Master Steve

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Disk Crash! -or- Where's my Monday Minions?


By now, I certainly hope you're wondering where your weekly dose of Minions is. Fact is, I had a major hard-disk crash on my desktop computer late last week. (The main drive is apparently intact, but because I had swap files on the bad drive, there were and are all sorts of spin-off problems that have rendered the machine unreliable.) The bad news it totally ate my directory of Minions cartoons and materials. The good news is, I should have everything backed up. The bad news is I lost all my video source material for "Minions Tonight," "Letters to No. 1" and "Der Governator." My fault for not backing it up, but the file sizes were so huge, I kept putting it off. Too late now. Sigh.

So, I just ordered a new computer from Dell, and it should be here in a week or so. But because I do all my photo-editing work on the desktop and have all my fonts, templates and tools there, it's tricky for me to put together a Minions cartoon on my laptop machine. I DID find time to set up and shoot a new cartoon over the weekend (while I was trying to rebuild my crashed disk and salvage what files I could), I just haven't had time to turn it into a cartoon yet. I'll try to get to it later this week if what's left of my computer will cooperate.

In the mean time, if you're just feeling terrible-bad about this whole thing, you could buy something from our Cafepress Stores. We don't make much on most of our items there, but hey, every little bit helps!

http://www.cafepress.com/minionsatwork
http://www.cafepress.com/houseofnaughty

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Minions #130 - Incentive Pay



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Check Boxes!


Returning from California soon, if I'm not already back. Minions on auto-pilot, but I may check in...

- Missing Minion Master Steve

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Minions #129 - Qualified Applicant



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a "hey, the economy is doing great!" msg Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and your visits to our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores. Or check our our fine sponsors.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by an actual candidate.)


Greetings, Under-employed Minion-lovers!


Still in California. Outsourced all the Minions to India while I'm gone.

- Minion Employer Steve

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Minions #128 - Visitation Rites



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and your visits to our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores. Or check our our fine sponsors.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by an actual candidate.)


Greetings, Fossil Fiends!


I'm leaving on my previously announced trip, but don't worry, I've got the Minions stocked and set on autopilot through the end of the month, so we're good, no matter what happens.

- Jurassic Steve

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Monday, September 08, 2008

Minions #127 - Talking Trailer Trash



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and your visits to our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores. Or check our our fine sponsors.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by an actual candidate.)


Greetings, Modular Minions!


The General Zed/No. 1 rivalry continues. What's with these guys? History, I tell you. One of these days we'll have to go into that bit of backstory.

Meanwhile, it looks like there might be an unexpected trip later in the month, which means I'm going to be slamming hoping to stockpile enough cartoons so that there are no outages while I'm gone. Next week's toon is already well in process, and I'm hoping to build up a backlog. But be advised that I'll go into repeats or something for a week or two if I need to.

More news as it comes in.

- Minion-Lord Steve

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Minions #126 - Easily Discouraged



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Poor Fading Sunburns!


Yeah, it's the end of summer, a time which we greet with especially mixed feelings here at the lair. Yes, it means the good weather will go away soon, and we can look-forward to whatever surprises climate change has added to our already gray and wet winters.

But on the other hand...

THE TOURISTS ARE GONE! THE TOURISTS ARE GONE! WAHOO! WAHOO! THE TOURISTS ARE GONE!

Yeah, we live in a resort town, and man, am I glad to see them gone! Yes, we depend on them for the local economy, but unlike you guys, I can't just convince them to drop their wallet at the door and go home. No, they've got to hang around, clogging the roads, and the theaters, and the stores, and every place that serves any kind of food, and inconveniencing us by killing themselves on the beach in stupid ways.

(It's not like we want them to die. Really. With the outside voice anyway. Really, we do our very best to warn them about the rip-tides and the sneaker waves and the zillion ton beach logs that can roll over and crush you. But do they listen? Noooooooooooo! It's like in every horror movie when somebody says, "don't go in the basement!" So we're kind of fatalistic about it all. We figure, at least it's taking them out of the gene pool, which over thousands of years may either lead to smarter tourists, or more likely, stupid tourists with gills, blubber, and arm-muscles the size of the Hulk's.)

So anyway, I'm looking forward to the piece and quiet that will take over our little town starting tomorrow. Maybe I can enjoy the sun and blue skies we have left.

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Minions #125 - Service with a Smile



Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please hand your wallet to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a back-from-Vacation message from your Minon Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Poor Long Suffering Minions Fans!


This week, a special shout out to the crew at Hilltop, where the seating is always assigned. I know, that makes no sense to anybody, but they'll understand. Thanks for the lunches, guys!

Special congrats to Mrs. Minion Master, Chris, who just turned in the first of her upcoming (from Berkley Prime Crime) mystery novels to her editor. Yay, Chris! And speaking of Chris...

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.


A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

Obey your Minion-master, fire up your email and get to it!

- See you next week, Steve

Monday, August 18, 2008

Minions #124 - Out of Their Jurisdiction


Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a supposedly important and interesting message from your Minion Master.

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please hand your wallet to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a back-from-Vacation message from your Minon Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Poor Receptions!


You may be asking yourself, if you pay close attention to such things, "what the heck is General Zed doing running Doctor Coldblood's volcano lair?"

Well, the answer is simple. Is isn't Doctor Coldblood's volcano lair. It's General Zed's volcano lair. General Zed completely came up with it first. Ask anybody and they'll tell you. As long as it's General Zed, anyway.

Like it really matters, I suppose. Lairs are built from mail-order kits, like big Lego sets. Send off a few billion dollars by PayPal, wait a few weeks for delivery, and then snap together the modular walls, tunnels, and death traps into a configuration of your liking. Even if it just happens to look exactly like the Super Villain down the block...

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.


A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

Obey your Minion-master, fire up your email and get to it!

- See you next week, Steve

Monday, August 11, 2008

Minions #123 - Pengions



CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please hand your wallet to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a back-from-Vacation message from your Minon Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Flightless-ones!


Yes, I'm officially back, and so are the Minions.

It was a good trip, if tiring. I'm really having doubts about going back to Comicon unless I have a specific business reason to do so. It's a great place to go as a fan to see stuff, and it's great place for the Big Guys to go to promote something, but for the middle-to-little guys to promote, or especially to do business, it's just too big, loud, and distracting. There are other, more effective ways of getting things done.

So anyway, I've seen the Legion of Doom back into their holes to hatch some new evil schemes. I notice we didn't get a lot of comments on the Overlords at Work cartoons. Does that mean you didn't like them? If so, was it that you didn't like my jokes, or the repeated board-room layouts for a month, or that you just didn't like the Overlords at all?

Let me know. We aim to please.

A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

Obey your Minion-master, fire up your email and get to it!

- See you next week, Steve

Monday, August 04, 2008

Overlords #122 - Democracy in Action


Hey! I dare you to click the above panel! I double dare you! I DOUBLE-DOG DARE YOU! What are you? CHICKEN?

Bah! Your presence is insignificant to us, worm! Open your wallet and stare mindlessly at the hypnotic messages that follow! It...is...your...DESTINY!

Overlords atWork is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. We COMMAND you to fill our coffers by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions (or Overlords) at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(We command you to be naughty! Oh! You like it, don't you?)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will DESTROY YOUR PLANET!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions (or Overlords) at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*In the event that YOUR is also OUR planet, the Overlords reserve the right to destroy a substitute planet of equal or greater mass. Of course, we'll send you there first...


Greetings, Insignificant Scum!


You come seeking Minions, and yet, THERE ARE NO MINIONS! We, the Overlords of Evil have sent them on vacation! WITHOUT PAY! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

When the Minions finally return, in August, we will make them work overtime UNTIL THEIR EYES BLEED! And that's a LOT of overtime! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

Now, tremble before the most awesome assemblage of evil ever awesomely assembled! We give you: THE LEGION OF DREAD!

Our logo:


Fear our logo! Tremble before our mighty cartoon adventures! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

* cough, cough, cough *

Evil-laugh-fun-but-need-frosty-beverage-now...

OLD BUSINESS
Old business is left over from the previous management. The Overlords of Evil and the Legion of Dread do not endorse this old business, but they will gladly take responsibility for any damage or harm it causes. Worms.
Hey look at us! (Or our book covers anyway.)

I just put together a little mosaic of images of book covers and posted it on my regular blog. See it here. These are MOST of the books in which my wife Chris or I (or both of us) have appeared. It's pretty nifty to see these all at a glance. Check it out, and see what we do the rest of the week!

A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, when he returns, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

END OF OLD BUSINESS

Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

sluurp!

Ah! That's good!

We COMMAND you to return next week for a new cartoon! Obey, or suffer the pain of a thousand Star Wars Christmas Specials!

- Sincerely,
Your Lord and Masters,
Dr. Coldblood, et al.