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Showing posts with label Retirement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Retirement. Show all posts

Monday, February 16, 2009

Minions #151 - Hard to Swallow



Stand by, following some new commercial jibber-jabber for a time-out from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. For your convenience, please put us in your will, then walk off the nearest cliff. Try to land on your head. Thank you.

NEW! SUPPORT "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY!

We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Later, we'll be adding a selection of Minion-recommended merchandise, but until then, use your imagination. Books, videos, electronics, games, maybe even ACTION FIGURES!
Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Naughty is as naughty does!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

Greetings, Taste Testers!

So, I'm a little late this week. It's a holiday. Besides, my clock here shows I still have 38 minutes left of Monday!

It's not that I didn't have anything to post. There are still several cartoons in inventory. It's just some days it's hard to know what's funny. Things sit around in the inventory folder too long, and they just don't seem -- fresh -- any more. It's kind of like this.

Hey, for a four-month-old cartoon, that's pretty funny! Maybe these things don't get stale after all! And maybe that chunky milk is good drinking!

See you next week!

- Don't-Drink-the-Chunky-Milk-Steve

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Minions #136 - Suspended Employment




Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a generous severance package from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your precious metals to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a message of real change from your Maverick Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)


Greetings, Surplus Manpower!


On time two weeks in a row! How soon can we get lazy and start coasting again?

Anyway, here we are with another one of those pesky "topical" cartoons. You know what that means. Just apply where it hurts until the pain goes away.

Or something.

Well, listen, we've got things to do and plots to hatch this week, so I'm going to cut it short. See you next time.

- your Terminator at work, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Sure, Halloween is over, but don't let the fun end there!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Monday, July 07, 2008

Overlords #118 - Conflict of Interest



If you dare, click on the panel for a bigger version!

Bah! Your presence is insignificant to us, worm! Open your wallet and stare mindlessly at the hypnotic messages that follow! It...is...your...DESTINY!

Overlords atWork is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. We COMMAND you to fill our coffers by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions (or Overlords) at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(We command you to be naughty! Oh! You like it, don't you?)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will DESTROY YOUR PLANET!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions (or Overlords) at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*In the event that YOUR is also OUR planet, the Overlords reserve the right to destroy a substitute planet of equal or greater mass. Of course, we'll send you there first...


Greetings, Insignificant Scum!


You come seeking Minions, and yet, THERE ARE NO MINIONS! We, the Overlords of Evil have sent them on vacation! WITHOUT PAY! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

When the Minions finally return, in August, we will make them work overtime UNTIL THEIR EYES BLEED! And that's a LOT of overtime! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

Now, tremble before the most awesome assemblage of evil ever awesomely assembled! We give you: THE LEGION OF DREAD!

Our logo:


Fear our logo! Tremble before our mighty cartoon adventures! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

* cough, cough, cough *

Evil-laugh-fun-but-need-frosty-beverage-now...

OLD BUSINESS
Old business is left over from the previous management. The Overlords of Evil and the Legion of Dread do not endorse this old business, but they will gladly take responsibility for any damage or harm it causes. Worms.
Hey look at us! (Or our book covers anyway.)

I just put together a little mosaic of images of book covers and posted it on my regular blog. See it here. These are MOST of the books in which my wife Chris or I (or both of us) have appeared. It's pretty nifty to see these all at a glance. Check it out, and see what we do the rest of the week!

A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, when he returns, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

END OF OLD BUSINESS

Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

sluurp!

Ah! That's good!

We COMMAND you to return next week for a new cartoon! Obey, or suffer the pain of a thousand Star Wars Christmas Specials!

- Sincerely,
Your Lord and Masters,
Dr. Coldblood, et al.