Minions #149 - Belt Tightening Makes Me Hungry

In the event of a water landing, this cartoon can be used as a flotation device. Click on picture to inflate to full size.


Stand by, following some new commercial jibber-jabber for a time-out from your Minion Master!

Your visit is important to us. For your convenience, please put us in your will, then walk off the nearest cliff. Try to land on your head. Thank you.

NEW! SUPPORT "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Later, we'll be adding a selection of Minion-recommended merchandise, but until then, use your imagination. Books, videos, electronics, games, maybe even ACTION FIGURES!
Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.



While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Naughty is as naughty does!)

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

Greetings, Stay-at-homes!

Well, we're back from Florida. Really enjoyed the writer's conference and our four days at the space center (still not enough time!).

The plane trip on United Airlines? Not so much. I tell you, that outfit has some SERIOUS Evil Overlords in charge. But we got home without them killing us (unless this post-travel crud Mrs. Minion Master and I have does us in) so that's something.

I had really planned to shoot a new Minions for this week, but I just wasn't feeling up to it. Fortunately, I laid in some inventory before I left. Actually, I like this one quite a bit, and it is timely.

See you next week. Meanwhile, support the site by clicking through our Amazon link above and buy yourself a book. Maybe something by Chris or I.

Or not.

Actually, it would be better if you clicked through and bought a gigantic plasma TV. Yeah. That would be much better.

What the heck. Go for it. Tell them I sent you.

- Your parasite on the side of a failing economy: Steve

Minions #133 - Start Bailing

Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for some calming reassurances in this time of crisis from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a end-of-summer message from your Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two in a designer dress and librarian-glasses and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by the candidate.)


Greetings, Victims of Circumstance!

AHHHH! AHHHHH! PANIC! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! CASH OUT WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR 401K AND INVEST IT IN TULIP BULBS AND CANNED GOODS! HURRY! FOR GOD'S SAKE HURRY!

Oh.

Wait.

Was I supposed to say something calming?

I don't often hit on current events, but since this gave me an excuse to reuse one of my all-time-favorite Minions at Work images, I couldn't resist. (I've got another scene set up at Minions Studios that I had intended to post, but maybe you'll get it later in the week as that make-up cartoon I've been promising.)

Anyway, we're all just Minions in this great nation of ours, and rule number one of being a Minion is, you really don't have any control anyway, so there's no sense in panicking. Just adopt a zen-like state of calm, go to your inner Happy Place, and try to hold onto the handrail so the blast doesn't blow you off the catwalk and into the yawning abyss.

See? Isn't that better?

- your helpful Minion Master, Steve.


And don't forget to run out and spend your last few dollars on that
new anthology with a great new story by Mrs. Minion Master! It's called "Witch High," and features stories by 14 top authors about the students of Salem Township Public High-school #4." Just in time for Halloween! Buy a bunch of copies and corrupt all the little witches and warlocks that show up at your door!

BUY "WITCH HIGH" ON AMAZON NOW!

Minions #129 - Qualified Applicant

Stand by, following the usually commercial jibber-jabber for a secret message from your Minion Master!

CLICK ON IMAGES FOR LARGER VERSIONS

Your visit is important to us. Please give all your bank account and personal information to the nearest Minion and stare mindlessly at the screen for a "hey, the economy is doing great!" msg Minion Master, following the usual commercial interruptions.

Minions at work is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and your visits to our advertisers. Help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores. Or check our our fine sponsors.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will send a vice-presidential candidate to kiss all your babies!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send Minion Number Two and he's just going to bruise the little tyke's face with his gas-mask. This, however, is still better than being kissed by an actual candidate.)


Greetings, Under-employed Minion-lovers!

Still in California. Outsourced all the Minions to India while I'm gone.

- Minion Employer Steve

A Word -- actually, lots of them -- from Mrs. Minion Master:

New in stores, a great new fantasy anthology with a new story by Mrs. Minion Master, Christina F. York. It's called "Enchantment Place," edited by Denise Little. It's 17 original stories about a magical shopping destination in Chicago where the really unusual people shop for items you can scarcely imagine. And no, we don't mean Hot Topic!

Find it now at your local bookseller, or order from Amazon.

Overlords #118 - Conflict of Interest

If you dare, click on the panel for a bigger version!

Bah! Your presence is insignificant to us, worm! Open your wallet and stare mindlessly at the hypnotic messages that follow! It...is...your...DESTINY!

Overlords atWork is inadequately supported by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. We COMMAND you to fill our coffers by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions (or Overlords) at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great gift:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where the beatings will continue until all customers are satisfied!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(We command you to be naughty! Oh! You like it, don't you?)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will DESTROY YOUR PLANET!* It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions (or Overlords) at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*In the event that YOUR is also OUR planet, the Overlords reserve the right to destroy a substitute planet of equal or greater mass. Of course, we'll send you there first...


Greetings, Insignificant Scum!

You come seeking Minions, and yet, THERE ARE NO MINIONS! We, the Overlords of Evil have sent them on vacation! WITHOUT PAY! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

When the Minions finally return, in August, we will make them work overtime UNTIL THEIR EYES BLEED! And that's a LOT of overtime! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

Now, tremble before the most awesome assemblage of evil ever awesomely assembled! We give you: THE LEGION OF DREAD!

Our logo:


Fear our logo! Tremble before our mighty cartoon adventures! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

* cough, cough, cough *

Evil-laugh-fun-but-need-frosty-beverage-now...

OLD BUSINESS
Old business is left over from the previous management. The Overlords of Evil and the Legion of Dread do not endorse this old business, but they will gladly take responsibility for any damage or harm it causes. Worms.
Hey look at us! (Or our book covers anyway.)

I just put together a little mosaic of images of book covers and posted it on my regular blog. See it here. These are MOST of the books in which my wife Chris or I (or both of us) have appeared. It's pretty nifty to see these all at a glance. Check it out, and see what we do the rest of the week!

A reminder. We need input!

First of all, we need a number for our new Minion, seen manning the dart-board in this recent cartoon.

Also, when he returns, No. 1 needs letters with your "questions for Minions" to be answered in a future video. Surely there's something you want to know about being a Minion, life in the Lair, the forces of evil, or No. 1's early Oscar picks.

END OF OLD BUSINESS

Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha! Ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-haha-ha-haha-ha-hahaha-ha-haha-hahaha!

sluurp!

Ah! That's good!

We COMMAND you to return next week for a new cartoon! Obey, or suffer the pain of a thousand Star Wars Christmas Specials!

- Sincerely,
Your Lord and Masters,
Dr. Coldblood, et al.