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Monday, November 30, 2009

Minions #196 - Watch What You Eat

Be sure to read today's Minion Master Message for a Minions Holiday Gift Guide!


Click cartoon to big-O-fy!

Stand by, following the usual frozen dinner for an evil-pop from your Minion Master!

Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the radioactive carno-voles just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."

SUPPORT THE FORCES OF EVIL, WITHOUT WHOM YOU'D HAVE TO LIVE IN SOME BORING UTOPIA OR SOMETHING! HELP FINANCE "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY! IT'S LIKE STEALING, ONLY LEGAL!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Or visit our Amazon Lair Gift Shop for Minions-recommended merchandise featuring villainy from across pop-culture!

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(For very small values of naughty.)

Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens.

Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar!

Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time.

Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!



Greetings, Stuffed Shirts!

Is that rumble in your stomach the swine flu you caught waiting in the "Black Friday" line outside Best Buy, or that last dressing-sandwich that just didn't quite smell right? We don't care, because we're evil!

Yes, it's that interminable wait between major holidays, the twilight zone of celebration, the void of despair between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Oh, sure, not all of you out there in the big, wide, diverse world that we live in, celebrate both (or either) of these holidays, or at least, don't celebrate them at the same time, but you can suffer along with the majority of us U.S. Americans, by playing along with our home game. Just stuff yourself to bursting with mashed potatoes and stand in line at Target (or local equivalent) for a month, and you'll get the gist of it.

To make things easier for you, here's our handy "Minions at Work" gift guide. Remember, when you purchase through our guide, you help keep the evil coming here at "Minions at Work!"

First of all, who couldn't use an "Evil is not my Natuture, Evil is Just my Day Job" tee-shirt, sweatshirt, hat, mug, mousepad, or other "Minions at Work" item to enliven their person, workplace, or unemployment line!  We've got teddy bears, calendars, clocks, and all sorts of insane stuff. You'll find all these, and more, at our "Minions at Work" Cafe Press store. Shop HERE!

If you need a more personal gift, or if you need party-wear for new year's eve, may we recommend our exclusive "I've Got Evil in my Pants" clothing and accessory line over at "Number Two's House of Naughty."

Is the writer on your list having agent trouble?  Trouble finding an agent?  Do they have an agent?  (Then they've probably got trouble?)  Help them put things in perspective, and show the agents of the world who's in charge, with a shirt, mug, or other item featuring the world's worst literary agent, Sydney T. Cat!  Yes, anybody can call themselves a literary agent, even a cat!  And if it isn't prohibited, it's required!

Each item feature's "Bad Agent Sydney's" business card with her likeness, and the slogan "Bad Agent!  No Catnip!"  Funny and tons of fun!  Find the Bad Agent line HERE.

You can also support Minions at Work by buying one of the many books written by or featuring work by your Minion Master J. Steven York, and Mrs. Minion Master Christina F. York (who also writes mystery under the name Christy Evans)!  We've made it easy for you by setting up our own Amazon Store featuring our work.  Find it HERE.

And if nothing else strikes your fancy, we've also set up another Amazon Store featuring a variety of Minion-recommended minion and overlord themed products, including DVDs, books, and more!  Find it HERE.

See!  That should take care of your entire list for you!  And all the proceeds go to US!  We're EVIL, darn it!

See you next week.

                                       - Minion Shopmaster Steve

Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!



Monday, November 23, 2009

Minions #195 Strange Change


Click to enlarge!


Stand by, following the usual interminable queue for a rubber-stamp from your Minion Master!

Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the winged-fire-ants just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."

SUPPORT THE FORCES OF EVIL, WITHOUT WHOM YOU'D HAVE TO LIVE IN SOME BORING UTOPIA OR SOMETHING! HELP FINANCE "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY! IT'S LIKE STEALING, ONLY LEGAL!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Or visit our Amazon Lair Gift Shop for Minions-recommended merchandise featuring villainy from across pop-culture!

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(For very small values of naughty.)

Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens.

Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar!

Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time.

Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!



Greetings, Capitalistic Cast-offs!

Running a little late this week.  I'm busy shooting some more cartoons using the nifty green reactor-thing from last-week's cartoon, but I hate to run the same kind of scene two weeks in a row when I can help it.  So I dipped into my rapidly shrinking inventory of stand-by cartoons, and just as I was about to post, discovered I'd ALREADY used this particular cartoon back in October!  I hate it when that happens.

So, I had to go combing through my now-thousands of Minions stock-photos and outtakes to come up with some new cartoons.  So not only do I have something new (and topical) for you today, but I have a number of new inventory cartoons standing by as well.  Like they say, when life gives you lemons...  Well, actually, I don't care what they say.  I DON'T LIKE LEMONS!  I'm just evil that way.

See you guys next week.

- Minion Master Steve


Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!



Monday, November 16, 2009

Minions #194 - Don't Need to Know


Stand by, following the usual unidentified hardware for an important safety advisory by your Minion Master!

Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the brain worms just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."

SUPPORT THE FORCES OF EVIL, WITHOUT WHOM YOU'D HAVE TO LIVE IN SOME BORING UTOPIA OR SOMETHING! HELP FINANCE "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY! IT'S LIKE STEALING, ONLY LEGAL!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Or visit our Amazon Lair Gift Shop for Minions-recommended merchandise featuring villainy from across pop-culture!

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(For very small values of naughty.)

Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens.

Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar!

Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time.

Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!



Greetings, Unskilled and Underinformed Workers!

I plugged books last week (go back and look!) and I'm running late, so I'll keep this short and sweet: CARTOON!

See you next time,

- Minion Master Steve


Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!



Sunday, November 08, 2009

Minions #193 - Don't Quote me Bro!




Click, click, CLICK to make cartoons BIGGER


Stand by, following the usual hospitality for a tainted drink from your Minion Master!

Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the reindeer of doom just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."

SUPPORT THE FORCES OF EVIL, WITHOUT WHOM YOU'D HAVE TO LIVE IN SOME BORING UTOPIA OR SOMETHING! HELP FINANCE "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY! IT'S LIKE STEALING, ONLY LEGAL!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Or visit our Amazon Lair Gift Shop for Minions-recommended merchandise featuring villainy from across pop-culture!

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(For very small values of naughty.)

Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens.

Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar!

Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time.

Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!



Greetings, "Honored" -uh- "Guests!"

It's been a while since I plugged books, and it's darned well time.  Somebody has to pay the bills around here.

First of all, I have a new anthology story out.  The anthology is called "The Trouble with Heroes," and my story is called "Boldy Reimagined."  I think serious fans of Battlestar Galactica or Joss Whedon may find this story, set in the writer's room of a new fantasy/sci-fi TV series, amusing.

Plus, hey, I hear there are actually other stories in there.  Stories by writers nearly as talented as my magnificently evil self.  That could be a considered a bonus.  You can find it in mass-market paperback in the sf/fantasy section of your favorite bookseller, or order it from Amazon HERE.


Mrs. Minion Master has been busy as well, in her alias of Christy Evans.  Her first mystery novel, "Sink Trap," featuring the crime-busting adventures of a female plumber, is out to rave reviews.  (Don't believe me?  Check the quote on her web-site, HERE.)

It's a fun read, and a great gift for anyone struggling with remodeling and home repairs.

Once again, it's out in mass-market paperback, and you can find a copy in all finer booksellers.  (If they don't have it in stock, they aren't really fine.)  Or, you can order it from Amazon.com right HERE.

Sink trap is only the first of a trilogy of books that are already complete.  The second installment, "Lead Pipe Cinch" is out in April of next year, and we just got our first look at the cover.  Here it is:


Like I said, this is out in April, so you can't buy it yet, but if you're really eager, it's available for pre-order on Amazon.  Go HERE.

So, go buy them one, or buy them all (or any of our other books) and help support Minions at Work.  Or, just send us the heck money (that's what the donation button below is for).  A dollar would be nice.  Or a trillion.  Or perhaps something in-between.  Your choice.  (The closer to a trillion, the better.)

See you guys next week.

- Your Shill-Master, Steve

Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!



Monday, November 02, 2009

Minions #192 - Kennel Ration


Stand by, following the usual dog run for a yank on the collar from your Minion Master!

Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the crab parasites just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."

SUPPORT THE FORCES OF EVIL, WITHOUT WHOM YOU'D HAVE TO LIVE IN SOME BORING UTOPIA OR SOMETHING! HELP FINANCE "MINIONS AT WORK" BY BUYING STUFF YOU WERE GOING TO BUY ANYWAY! IT'S LIKE STEALING, ONLY LEGAL!
We're now Amazon.com affiliates, which means that if you click on the Amazon link in our sidebar and make purchases from Amazon, a tiny little sliver of what you spend goes to support these fine (maybe even near-mint!) cartoons!

Or visit our Amazon Lair Gift Shop for Minions-recommended merchandise featuring villainy from across pop-culture!

Minions at work is inadequately supported during this financial crisis by your purchases from our web stores and our advertisers. Feed the economy and help us bleed green just a little more slowly by purchasing tee-shirts, buttons, calendars, hats, undies (we kid not!), and other fine Minions at Work items at one of the following stores.

While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(For very small values of naughty.)

Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens.

Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.

Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar!

Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time.

Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!



Greetings, Mongrels and Litter Runts!

We're finally getting back on track around here after a month of schedule disruptions, distractions, and sickness.  I'm back to building some new sets and trying out some new props and characters, back down in the bowels of the lair where we belong!  (All that fresh air we've been getting lately has just given me a kennel cough!)  Hopefully we'll be back here, on time, and with fresh material for a while!

By the way, our Latino minion has shown up a number of times, but I'm now giving him an official designation.  Henceforth he shall be known as "Numero Cinco," (Number Five) in honor of the Mexican holiday Cinco de Mayo.  (Which in the U.S. is a celebration of Mexican pride, and in parts of Mexico, a celebration of the day the Mexicans kicked the French in the ass, which is pretty fun in itself.  And don't tell me they didn't have it coming!)

That's not to say that Cinco is necessarily Mexican.  It's typical gringo stupidity to assume that all Hispanics are Mexicans.  Cinco might be Cuban, or Columbian, or Salvadorian, or who-knows-what.  He might even be a red-white-and-blue Texas-born Tejano.  I'd like to keep that kind of vague, so he can stand in for all of them.

I know people have strong feelings about this, but most of the Latinos I know, citizens and visitors alike, are good, hard-working, family-folk.  Many of them take important-yet-dirty-jobs that the rest of us wouldn't touch, keep our nation running, and as thanks, often get nothing but grief and abuse.

In other words, they can proudly count themselves among the ranks of the Minions!  

Yeah, just like the rest of us.  Remember, we're all equals down here under the thumbs of our Overlord oppressors, so don't take it out on them.  Ain't no border wall high enough to keep The Man from shipping jobs out of the country.  Just saying.

See you guys next week

- Steve

Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!