Minions #323 - Carry on!

Click cartoon for Extra Baggage!

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Greetings, Shoulder-bags and roll-arounds!

Is your shirt this cool?  I think not!

Today's cartoon is brought to you by the awesome new dinosaur-skeleton shirt that my wife just gave me as a birthday present!

Now, I loves me some Hawaiian shirts, and I've got a bunch of them that I wear pretty much all summer, and any time I travel from Oregon to warmer locations in the winter.  I especially love nerdy Hawaiian shirts, and I have a few that I treasure, with things like spiders, cartoon space shuttles, and giant Japanese robots.

But shirts like that are hard to find off-the-shelf, and if you're an odd size like me (six-foot-six and none-too-slim, Steve smash!) it's just impossible.  So the ones I've got have all been custom made, mostly hand-made gifts from my wonderful daughter.

But she's got like, a life and stuff, and does not spend all her spare time making me shirts, and I know there are some of you out there who might lust after such a shirt, and have nobody at all who could make it for them.  I've got a solution for you, but on to that in a minute...

Anyway, you might think that the hard part about this shirt is the fabric, but turns out there are TONS of nerd-cool fabrics out there that would make a cool Hawaiian shirt.  My wife found this one at a regular-old craft store, and there are plenty of on-line sources, and even on-line places that print custom fabrics.  You can even buy stuff (including old and out-of-print designs) on eBay!  So, once you have fabric, all you need is to find somebody to turn it into a shirt for you!

So, how about the person who made mine (who just happens to be my sister-in-law) who is starting her own custom shirt business?  Drop on over to Sew Campy Shirts and see how it's done.  The site is still under construction, but you'll find tips on picking and buying fabric, prices, and instructions on placing an order.

And it doesn't have to take forever.  Your ship could ship in as little as ten days.  Yeah, it's going to cost you a little more than a store-bought shirt, but trust me, these things get attention, and there's nothing more satisfying when people ask about it (and they will ask) than to say, "why thanks, it's custom made!"  And walk away knowing you've got the only one on the planet like it!  Winning!


Tell her I sent you, and she'll try extra hard to take all the pins out!

I'll just be chilling out here in my awesome shirt, and see you folks back here next week!

                                   - Minion Master, Steve

     

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Minions #322 - Boarding Instructions

Click Cartoon for More Legroom

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Greetings, No-class Fliers!


Sorry we totally flaked out on last week's cartoon.  Pressures of family health emergencies have played havoc with our schedules and comedic energy levels.I had the concept for this week's cartoon worked out and had started building the set, but realized I wasn't going to get it done even by late Monday without pulling an all-nighter, and just decided to waste.  The end-result is probably better than it would have been anyway, as it allowed me to dig out some mission props and to take my time setting things up a little more carefully.  It took time and experimentation to get all the elements I wanted into the shot.

It has been pointed out to me by Mrs. Minion Master that the background wall is suspiciously close to the plane, making you wonder what happened to the far wing.  On considering this, I offer the following possible  explanations:

A: The "wall" in in fact the corner of something, or perhaps a much smaller structure.  It ends just at the left of the cartoon and the plane's wing projects around the corner.

B: The plane is a crazy cartoon plane like those commonly seen on the old "Bullwinkle and Rocky" commercials, with absurdly long landing gear, and even more absurdly short wings.  Imagine a couple of cartoon clouds zooming past in the background on an endless loop, while the announcer intones: "Meanwhile our heroes could imagine that in the skies far above Frostbite Falls..." and you'll get the general idea.

C: The wing broke off when the plane crashed into the building.  This is not surprising when you realize the plane is clearly piloted by Charles Lindbergh, and he's dead.  In this case, you have only to imagine that what Minion No. 1, standing in the background, is saying into his walkie-talkie is, "...oh, yeah, don't cancel the flight.  That will totally buff out!"

D: Why are you even wondering where the wing is when you first need to ask yourself, how did those enormous nose-wheels get through that little, tiny, landing gear door?

See you folks back here next week -- if we don't get detained at security...

                - Your Pal in Gitmo, Minion Master Steve

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Minions #256 - Where there's Smoke...

Click for BIG Screen

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Greetings, Core News Demographic!


Well, Doctor Coldblood continues his drunken binge this week, even though it's a little early for spring break.

Just another quick book plug.  Mrs. Minion Master, in her secret alias of "Christy Evans," has a new mystery coming out February 1st, the third in her series of crime-solving-plumber mysteries.  It's called "Drip Dead."  Check it out where ever books are sold!  Or recommend it to the nearest mystery fan immediately!  We've got bills to pay here!

Point in fact, we're being served up with some irony this week.  The lair is being invaded by heating repair guys who are going to be grubbing around our crawl-space replacing all the duct work.

Why is this ironic?  Well, my story "Gordie Culligan vs. Doctor Long Beach and the HVAC of Doom," written for the anthology "If I Were an Evil Overlord," is about a heroic heating and air-conditioning guy working in the ducts of a volcanic lair (that just happens to be located in Long Beach, California).

Got to check my paperwork.  If the rights on that story have reverted, I much just post it here as a freebie for you guys to read soon.  I'll let you know...

- Irony Master, Steve

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Minions #255 - Snakes, Why Did We Have to Be Snakes?

Click Image for Further Embarrassment!

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Greetings, Wishing You Were Somewhere Else Peoplessh!


Hey, want some free ebooks?  Then follow me on Twitter.  Starting next week I'm going to be giving away coupons good for a free download of my new ebook "DeadRingers" (available in all major ebook formats, so you can read on your ereader, phone, pad or computer) from Smashwords.com!  Just follow and look for a give-away post.  First follower to respond is the winner!  Easy!


I plan to do this several times through the week, depending on the response, so don't give up if you don't win the first time.  I also plan to do this for future ebook releases, so stay-tuned for further chances to win!


Still want more ebooks?  Follow the tireless Robot CEO of our ebook publisher, Tsunami Ridge Publishing.  He'll be giving away books by my wife, Christina F. York (who writes romance, fantasy, and mystery) as well as myself and other authors.

Not on Twitter yet?  Just follow one of the links above for free and easy sign-up!

See you guys next week.

- Steve

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Minions #253 - Snakes! Why did it have to be snakes?

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Greetings, Bar-flies!


Yeah, we're a little late this time.  I could say we're slow coming back after the holidays, and that's true, but the big thing is that I've felt like some of the shoots I've done lately were overly simple and thrown together.  I wanted something new, and something with some work put into it.

So you get -- THIS -- Fifteen figures, plus several hundred props, set pieces, and lots and lots of snakes!  I've been tinkering with it off-and-on all week.  Was the joke worth it?  Probably not, but that's not the point.

Oh, I do have something to plug this week: I've got a new science fiction mini-anthology ebook out titled "DeadRingers."  The tag line is, "The restless dead live in memories, both human and electronic. But who controls those memories, and how are the lives of the living still tangled in the echoes of the dead?"  

It contains the short story "Carved in Stone," which original appeared in Analog Science Fiction magazine, a previously unpublished companion-novelette, "The Last Ride of Johnny Four-speed," and a new essay about how reality is starting to catch up with the "DeadRingers" technology used in the stories.  All for $2.99 on Amazon Kindle, or on SmashWords.com where you can find most other ebook formats.  It's coming soon to the Nook store, iPad, Kobo and other major ebook outlets as well.  Download a free sample either place and have a look-see...

See you guys next week, maybe even on time!

- Minion Master, Steve

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