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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Evil will resume soon

Posting from my phone, so I will be brief. sorry about the interruption in your minion cartoons. Just when we thought medical adventures were taking a lull, mrs minion master ended up in a hospital 100 miles from home for emergency surgery, and I'm here with her. she is recovering well and we hope to be home in a few days.  so I HOPE we'll be back to schedule shortly. Check back next week!

Monday, July 02, 2012

Minions #325 - Troublesome Clogs


Yes, we totally missed last week, without even a note of explanation.  As I've said before, we've been dealing with an ongoing family health emergency that has just has us overloaded, and in addition, I had a story due on deadline for a real, live, paying anthology, and that took priority for the little time I did have.  The good news, health emergency getting less "emerg" as time goes on, the story is turned in on time (another in my "Clockwork Cowboy" steampunk western series, if you were curious), and we have a new cartoon for you this week, right on time!  Hey, you were probably on vacation and didn't even notice we were missing?  Did you?  DID YOU?  Didn't think so!
Click Cartoon for Bigger Plunger!
See you guys back here next week!

                             - Minion Master Steve
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Monday, June 18, 2012

Minions #324 - Lesser of Two Evils

Click Cartoon for a Bigger Mess!



Greetings, Plungers and Low-flows!


Today's cartoon is brought to you by "Westward Weird," a great collection stories that put science-fiction and fantasy spins on tales of the old-west, including my steampunk western story, The Clockwork Cowboy!


Though I wrote "Clockwork Cowboy" as a stand-alone story, Liberty Brass, the damaged Confederate clockwork artilleryman hero of my story was too good to just let be.  While "The Clockwork Cowboy" takes place later in his adventures, it raised so many questions about his past that I decided to skip back to his origins and start writing forward from there.  

The first follow-on story, "The Unwinding of Liberty Brass," is a prequel, flashing back to just after Liberty Brass parted ways with the Army of the Confederacy after the battle at Gettysburg.  He's a broken man, literally, and figuratively, but a chance encounter will change his life, force him to choose between death, and the path that will lead him to become the Clockwork Cowboy of legend.
Click to order from Amazon
And I'm happy to report that in just a few weeks, the next installment in the adventures of the Clockwork Cowboy will start appearing in ebook stores, and it's his biggest and wildest yet!

As Liberty Brass and his amazing clockwork horse, Piston, make their way west, they are first attacked by a clockwork highwayman.  They have no sooner subdued their attacker when they are all taken prisoner by a mysterious pair of clockwork men named Copperpot and Kettle, and taken to a forgotten plantation house deep in the Kentucky hills, ruled by the wondrous Steam Man.  At first it seems a utopia, where mechanical men live in peace, free from the wars of men, and work for their common good.

 But there are secrets here, deep as a mine shaft, and dark as Kentucky coal, and Liberty learns that the price of truth just might be the loss of his freedom -- or his mechanical life!
A Preview of the Cover for "The Steam Man's Plantation/"
Watch this space for further announcements!

See you folks back here next week!

            - Clockwork Minion Master Steve


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Monday, June 11, 2012

Minions #323 - Carry on!

Click cartoon for Extra Baggage!



Greetings, Shoulder-bags and roll-arounds!


Is your shirt this cool?  I think not!
Today's cartoon is brought to you by the awesome new dinosaur-skeleton shirt that my wife just gave me as a birthday present!

Now, I loves me some Hawaiian shirts, and I've got a bunch of them that I wear pretty much all summer, and any time I travel from Oregon to warmer locations in the winter.  I especially love nerdy Hawaiian shirts, and I have a few that I treasure, with things like spiders, cartoon space shuttles, and giant Japanese robots.

But shirts like that are hard to find off-the-shelf, and if you're an odd size like me (six-foot-six and none-too-slim, Steve smash!) it's just impossible.  So the ones I've got have all been custom made, mostly hand-made gifts from my wonderful daughter.

But she's got like, a life and stuff, and does not spend all her spare time making me shirts, and I know there are some of you out there who might lust after such a shirt, and have nobody at all who could make it for them.  I've got a solution for you, but on to that in a minute...

Anyway, you might think that the hard part about this shirt is the fabric, but turns out there are TONS of nerd-cool fabrics out there that would make a cool Hawaiian shirt.  My wife found this one at a regular-old craft store, and there are plenty of on-line sources, and even on-line places that print custom fabrics.  You can even buy stuff (including old and out-of-print designs) on eBay!  So, once you have fabric, all you need is to find somebody to turn it into a shirt for you!

So, how about the person who made mine (who just happens to be my sister-in-law) who is starting her own custom shirt business?  Drop on over to Sew Campy Shirts and see how it's done.  The site is still under construction, but you'll find tips on picking and buying fabric, prices, and instructions on placing an order.

And it doesn't have to take forever.  Your ship could ship in as little as ten days.  Yeah, it's going to cost you a little more than a store-bought shirt, but trust me, these things get attention, and there's nothing more satisfying when people ask about it (and they will ask) than to say, "why thanks, it's custom made!"  And walk away knowing you've got the only one on the planet like it!  Winning!


Tell her I sent you, and she'll try extra hard to take all the pins out!

I'll just be chilling out here in my awesome shirt, and see you folks back here next week!

                                   - Minion Master, Steve

     
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Sunday, June 03, 2012

Minions #322 - Boarding Instructions

Click Cartoon for More Legroom



Greetings, No-class Fliers!


Sorry we totally flaked out on last week's cartoon.  Pressures of family health emergencies have played havoc with our schedules and comedic energy levels.I had the concept for this week's cartoon worked out and had started building the set, but realized I wasn't going to get it done even by late Monday without pulling an all-nighter, and just decided to waste.  The end-result is probably better than it would have been anyway, as it allowed me to dig out some mission props and to take my time setting things up a little more carefully.  It took time and experimentation to get all the elements I wanted into the shot.

It has been pointed out to me by Mrs. Minion Master that the background wall is suspiciously close to the plane, making you wonder what happened to the far wing.  On considering this, I offer the following possible  explanations:

A: The "wall" in in fact the corner of something, or perhaps a much smaller structure.  It ends just at the left of the cartoon and the plane's wing projects around the corner.

B: The plane is a crazy cartoon plane like those commonly seen on the old "Bullwinkle and Rocky" commercials, with absurdly long landing gear, and even more absurdly short wings.  Imagine a couple of cartoon clouds zooming past in the background on an endless loop, while the announcer intones: "Meanwhile our heroes could imagine that in the skies far above Frostbite Falls..." and you'll get the general idea.

C: The wing broke off when the plane crashed into the building.  This is not surprising when you realize the plane is clearly piloted by Charles Lindbergh, and he's dead.  In this case, you have only to imagine that what Minion No. 1, standing in the background, is saying into his walkie-talkie is, "...oh, yeah, don't cancel the flight.  That will totally buff out!"

D: Why are you even wondering where the wing is when you first need to ask yourself, how did those enormous nose-wheels get through that little, tiny, landing gear door?

See you folks back here next week -- if we don't get detained at security...

                - Your Pal in Gitmo, Minion Master Steve

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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Sorry we're late this week...BUT WE'RE EVIL!

Your Minion Master Here,


Sorry we're late this week, folks!  I had every intention of getting a new cartoon out on Tuesday (because of the U.S. holiday).  Had the gag all planned, and even started setting up for the shoot.  


But a lot of Life has been happening here at the lair, what with a close family member having a triple heart bypass and Mrs. Minion Master spending the weekends in a neighboring city to take care of said relative.  


Between that, the holiday, and the fact that I've been busy writing a long-delayed piece of fiction (which I just finished a few minutes ago) I decided this week's cartoon could just get bumped down the priority list, and I wasn't going to lose any sleep over it.  


So, while the above cartoon is not exactly correct about the situation, it does describe my mood at the moment.  I definitely won't have the cartoon tonight, though it's always possible I could jump on it tomorrow or later in the week.  


Or maybe I'll just say screw it, and run it next Monday instead.  Uncertainty.  It's how I roll right now.


So, while I hate to be an unreliable spoil-sport, that's just the way it's going to be this week.


But definitely I'll do better next week, so check back in a day or two if you want, just in case, and for sure be back here next Monday when there will for sure be a new Minions at Work cartoon!


- Steve

Monday, May 21, 2012

Minions #321 - We're Sunk!

Click Cartoon for Bigger Bomb!


Greetings, Studio Execs and Mini-Moguls!


I've got to tell you, sometimes this comic is guided by powers beyond my control or understanding.  Take tonight.  It's been a stressful week here at the lair, dealing with some serious family health issues (all of which seem to be resolving well, knock on unobtainium), and arrived home tonight, short of sleep, after a day mostly spent in the car driving mountain roads, and with no new comic to post.  I didn't even have a germ of an idea.

And part of me said, "screw it, it can just be late this week, or I can take a week off!  There are more important things, and I'm due!"  But I took a few minutes to wander over to the Minions at Work stage and look around for some inspiration.  And I picked up a box of assorted props that I hadn't look at in I-don't-know-how-long.  And my hand fell on a tiny replica of a Battleship TM game!  No, fate had decreed that sleep would be a while in coming.

Now, if you didn't know it, the "Battleship" movie opened in U.S. theaters this weekend, where it promptly caught fire, capsized, and sank.  Based on weekend box-office numbers, it looks to follow "John Carter" as this summer's second big-budget flop.

Now, part of me feels bad about this, because there are some nice folks over at Hasbro, which makes the Battleship game these days, and of course, I'm a huge fan of their classic GI Joe line, and have always had a soft-spot for the Transformers too.  But for the life of me, I can't understand how a movie like Battleship ever seemed like a good idea to anyone.

I mean, first of all, the idea that the game is a strong enough property to hang a major movie on pretty questionable.  I mean, there aren't even any characters (unless you count the plucky PT boat defending its two peg holes)!  But then, who thought, "let's turn it into an alien invasion movie?  And then pack it full of effects that look like outtakes from Transformers: Dark of the Moon!"  

This isn't the eighties folks!  You can't just blame it all on the cocaine!

But wait...  Maybe this isn't as insane an idea as it seems!  How's this for an alien-invasion "Battleship" movie premise:

Battleship

The nuclear aircraft carrier USS George Washington is scheduled to arrive at San Francisco harbor, but just off shore, the vessel slows to a stop and begins to drift.  There are no signs of damage or distress, but the ship doesn't answer.  When a helicopter is sent to investigate, the ship is empty, the crew missing.  There is no sign of a struggle, no sign of violence.  The crew has simply vanished...

Meanwhile, back at the Pentagon, Admiral Distinguished (played by a distinguished elder actor with a certain kind of rough grit, Clint Eastwood being the perfect choice, but there are others) and his talented but abrasive new aid, Commander Studmuffin, have been charged by the Joint Chiefs to get to the bottom of the mystery.  The Admiral is of course regarded as the greatest naval strategist of the modern age, and rapidly approaching retirement.  Commander Studmuffin is brilliant but insubordinate.  The Admiral, seeing his potential, has rescued him from a possible court-martial, and this is literally his last chance.

They soon learn that naval crews, only the very best, are disappearing all over the fleet, and when a Russian frigate is found adrift in the north Atlantic, the admiral realizes it isn't just happening to the US Navy.  He reaches out to a Russian admiral, and the two old cold-warriors face off.  The Russian is at first reluctant to admit the truth, but then is convinced to confirm that the same thing is happening to them.

Commander Studmuffin identifies a pattern in the disappearances, and is able to predict that the next disappearance will be the crew of a destroyer that his just left the very port they're at!  Radio communications are down, and a storm has grounded aircraft.  Fortunately, a small, plucky patrol boat is available that the Admiral commandeers to go after the destroyer and try and warn them.

They arrive, but too late!  They break out the fog and clouds to see a huge UFO hovering over the destroyer, which is trapped in a bubble of energy, like a fly in amber, a some kind of beam of energy scans the vessel.  A second beam sweeps the plucky patrol boat, which fires off a missile to try and distract the UFO.  This seems to work a little too well, as the UFO releases the destroyer and turns its attention on the little boat.  They try to escape, using every trick the Admiral and his aide can come up with, but it's not enough.  An energy field envelops the little vessel and...

The Admiral and the Commander wake up on the bridge of a ship.  A very OLD ship, though all the paint and equipment looks factory new.  They stagger out onto the gangways and look down on the deck of a vast battleship floating in a calm sea.  Below them, hundreds of sailors are pulling themselves from the deck, emerging from every hatch and passageway, dazed and confused.  Where are they, and how did they get on the deck of the U.S.S. Iowa, looking as new and ship-shape as when it set out for sea-trials in 1940...

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Minions #320 - Girl Talk

Click Cartoon for More Dish!



Greetings, BFFs and Girl-fiends!


Don't forget, you've only got till the end of the month to read my first "Panorama Beach" mystery, The Best Devil Money Can Buy," for FREE, all this month over on our writing site, YorkWriters.com.


If you'd prefer to read it on your device, the ebook is only $2.99 in all Major ebook stores, and the sequel, "A Breath Away From Dying" is also available for $3.99.  Like print?  Well, an omnibus containing both ebooks is coming very soon!  Watch for announcements!

See you gals and guys back here next week, same Minion Time, same Minion Channel!

                      - Minion Master Steve




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Monday, May 07, 2012

Minions #319 - A Walk in the Park

On Twitter?  Follow Minion No. 1 for site updates, 
the latest news from the forces of evil, 
and more Minions at Work fun! 
Click Cartoon for Bigger Dinosaur!


Greetings, Pooper Scoopers!


Don't forget, you can read my first "Panorama Beach" mystery, The Best Devil Money Can Buy," for FREE, all this month over on our writing site, YorkWriters.com.


If you'd prefer to read it on your device, the ebook is only $2.99 in all Major ebook stores, and the sequel, "A Breath Away From Dying" is also available for $3.99.  Like print?  Well, an omnibus containing both ebooks is coming very soon!  Watch for announcements!

Also in the mystery front, Mrs. Minion master's new mystery, "Murder Buys a T-Shirt," is also available in mass-market paperback at your favorite bookstore, as well as on your favorite device.  It's a fun contemporary mystery set in North Florida, featuring a souvenir shop owner and her foul-mouthed parrot which sometimes channels the voice of her late-uncle's ghost!

See you guys back here next week for more Minions madness!

- Minion Master, Steve

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Monday, April 30, 2012

Minions #318 - Office Light Weight

Read today's Post And Read a Free Mystery!
Click Cartoon for More of Less!



Greetings, Shin-Splints and Rib-cages!


Read "The Best Devil Money Can Buy " FREE
If you missed out on our coupon offer a while back or just don't have an ereader device yet, you've got yet another chance to read the first in my "Panorama Beach" mystery series for free, this time directly on the web!

Find it HERE!

See you guys back here next week with more "Minions at Work!"

                   -Minion Master Steve


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Sunday, April 22, 2012

Minions #318 - Sales Forced

Click Cartoon for Bigger Upsell!




Greetings, Cold Calls and Dubious Leads!

 This week I'm presenting a bonus bit of pop-culture business.  It's amazing just how many cartoon trivia references and pop-culture call-outs this "DC Nation" short, which first aired this week, squeezes into just over a minute.  I was especially delighted to see the call-out to my beloved, 1970s, GI Joe Adventure Team (complete with life-like hair and beard), the 12" GI Joe connection being my excuse for posting it here...

 


See you guys back here next week!

           - Minion Master Steve


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Monday, April 16, 2012

Minions #317 - Anti-gravity

If you missed our BONUS cartoon Thursday and its real-life back-story, see it HERE!
Click Cartoon for Bigger Uplift!



Greetings, Intimates and Undergarments!


Well, it's been a time for celebration this last week, as some good friends of the Lair had an anniversary of sorts, and so did we (see the bonus cartoon and the post that goes with it for details).  Also, congrats to Mrs. Minion Master for turning in the new book in her "Haunted Souvenir Shop" mystery series (the first installment, "Murder Buys a T-Shirt" is available here and wherever books or ebooks are sold).

We're going to keep things short this week, as there's a big storm blowing in (somebody has been using the weather control machine to keep their coffee warm again) and we want to get this posted before any possible power failures (we blame the forces of good!).

See you guys next week.

                 - Minion Master Steve

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Thursday, April 12, 2012

Bonus Minions #316 - Drywall Day!

Be Sure to Read Our Post for the Romantic, True Story of "Drywall Day!"
Click Cartoon for More On-the-job Romancing!
Hey, gang!  Welcome to a special, top-secret, mid-week "Minions at Work" update!  Why the bonus cartoon, and what the hell is "drywall day?"  Well, it's a very special anniversary, both for us here at the Lair, and for long-time friends of the Minions (and us), Rob and Ximena, and here's the untold story...

Way back when Mrs. Minion Master and I fled Eugene, Oregon, just ahead of the authorities to our present undisclosed-location, we cleverly disguised our new lair by buying a 1940s cottage with the intent of upgrading it to serve the forces of evil.  At some point about ten years ago we decided that we would convert the semi-attached garage into a new office for myself and my large collection of action-figures.  At this point, the Minions were but a glimmer in my eye.  We had no idea that the office would soon double as the photo-studio in which the Minions and their tiny world would take up residence.

We elected to take on the conversion ourselves, and to speed up the work, we called on a group of extra-friendly friends and had a "drywall party," kind of like a modern-day barn-raising, where we'd have plenty of hands to put up the sheet-rock on the walls.  And like I said, a good number of excellent friends showed up from near and far, including Rob and Ximena, who decided to car-pool over.  Just to show you the kind of friends they are, it was Rob's birthday and they came anyway.  (We did get him a cake, turning it into possibly history's only "drywall birthday party!)

Anyway, Rod and Ximena started out that weekend as a carpool, and ended it a couple, and they've been together ever since!  In fact, they're married, and a while back, moved from Oregon to sunny Arizona.  And apparently, they'd kept alive the memory of "Drywall Day" as a kind of anniversary for them.  As and I said, it has been ten years.  So when Ximena approached me about doing a special "Minions at Work" cartoon in honor of their anniversary, there was absolutely no way I could say no!

It was a bit of work though.  For example, I decided that I needed some Minion-scale surrogates (not look-alikes, that would have taken a lot more time and resources than we had) for Rob and Ximena, which was tough, considering we only had one female Minion, Number 67, and she didn't even remotely look the part.  But it was well-past time to diversify the crew, so I grabbed one of the Frankensteined Liv dolls I've been using to make female civilians and slapped a Minions uniform on her.  It was a rush job, and the fit of the uniform isn't great, but I think she turned out pretty good.  I'll try and tweak her look for future appearances, but she'll definitely be back.  There were other complications as well, like cutting sheets of 1/6th scale drywall!

And life threw us some curve-balls too, in the form of a major, seemingly life-threatening health scare for a family member, and Mrs. Minion Master was in the midst of finishing up her next mystery novel, which was already past deadline!

As always, there are things I wish we could have gotten better, but we got-er-done!

Anyway, happy tenth Drywall Day, guys (happy birthday too, Rob), and we'll be celebrating the birthday of the Lair here as well!

And we'll see everybody back here Monday for our regularly-scheduled Minion Madness!

               - Matrimonial Minion Master, Steve




Monday, April 09, 2012

Minions #315 - Unclear Course

Click Cartoon for Greater Ambiguity!



Greetings, Magnetic Deviations and Uncorrected Courses!


This being a holiday weekend, I'd normally wait to post this week's cartoon on Tuesday, but this is a SPECIAL week here at the lair, and we have a SECOND, TOP SECRET cartoon that will appear later in the week!  In fact, it's so secret, even WE don't know what it is yet!  But we'll come up with something!  Check back, oh, Thursday or so!

                 - Mysterious Minion Master, Steve
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Sunday, April 01, 2012

Minions #314 - Survey Says!

Add caption



Greetings, Standard Deviants and Sampling Errors!


A special challenge of doing a photo comic like "Minions at Work" is that I can't just think of a gag and draw a picture.  I have to find a way to visualize it with objects that I have on hand (or make, or can buy).  This creates special problems in a ways you wouldn't expect.

For instance, we have a large "cast" of standard characters in action-figure form.  Some of these have only been used once or twice, but some of them get used very often.  Some characters like Minion No. 1, Number 2, and Number 9 appear in a hung percentage of my comics, and so get used a lot.  And of course, I've been doing this for years now, so those action figures are subject to wear, tear, and the ravages of time. There also the danger that if any of my "actors" were lost or damaged, I'd have no way to replace them.  No. 1 and Number 2 both have "doubles" in case of damage or loss, and some of the others I might be able to replace or repair through some diligent Ebay shopping.  But most of the base action figures I use here are obscure, and in some cases, very rare.  The Penguin is a special problem.  I'd dearly love to have duplicates so I could safely modify him for greater articulation, but even though he's probably a generic dollar store toy under his costume, he originally came from a thrift store, and I've NEVER found another like him, despite years of searching.

So I'm careful with unique items, and I sometimes find myself needing to do repairs.  This week, for example, I fixed a long-standing problem with Minion Number 2.  The elastic that holds his gas mask on has been slowly stretching out of shape till it could no longer hold his mask on.  An earlier repair attempt to one strap had used the wrong size and shape of elastic and tended to roll off the back of his head, causing the mask to re-position itself.  But I finally found the right kind of elastic and took the time to replace the tiny straps.  He's all better for this week's panel!

And there are other problems as well.  I've got lots of generic "civilian" figures for street, office and bar scenes, but most of them are male.  It's surprisingly hard to find realistic female action figures in 1/6th scale.  Barbie's lack of realistic proportions are well reported in the press, and most versions of Barbie are so stiff and lacking in articulation that they look more like victims of some kind of poison-dart attack than real women.  And while there are true "action figure" women that are supposedly 1/6th scale, most are built like male-fantasy centerfolds, and are half a head taller than the average 1/6th male figure.  My Minions are a bit taller than the average GI Joe, but not tall enough for many of them.  Maybe okay for super-heroines, amazons or super-villainesses, but not for your average woman on the street.

Well, I've finally found a recipe to easily and (for the moment, anyway) cheaply create realistic, articulated, and proportional female figures to use in my cartoons.  I use Liv dolls for bodies.  These are big-headed mutant dolls in the style of the better-known Bratz dolls, but the bodies are well articulated and come in a variety of skin tones.  It's also easy to swap the big-mutant head for any of a zillion types of traditional fashion-doll heads.  The combination results in fairly realistic female figure that scales out well under six feet tall, and doesn't look like she has beach-balls for breast implants.  I've now got a half-dozen or so of these (you see one in today's panel).  So next time I do a bar scene, it won't have to be such a sausage-fest.

Donate using the button below, and you can help me to buy even more women to use here at the lair!  Wait.  That came out ALL wrong!

                  - Minion Master Steve


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Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Minions #313 - That Sinking Feeling!

Click Cartoon for Major Moping



Greetings, Sink Traps and Plumber's Nightmares!


Due to extenuating circumstances here at the Lair, we're running late this week, so I'm going to keep this short.  But I'd like to dedicate this cartoon to everybody out there that could use a little cheering up.  You know who you are!

Baring more unforeseen emergencies, we'll be back here next week!  See you then!

- Steve

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Monday, March 19, 2012

Minions #312 - Meet Doctor Wallstreet

Click Cartoon for Bigger Bailout!



Greetings, Fertilizer Spreaders and Tissue Matches!


A funny thing happened along the way to this week's cartoon...


We've never gone out of our way to be topical here at Minions at Work, though we've occasionally strayed across the line when there was a joke or a topic I just couldn't resist (as in last week's cartoon).  But in general, we've always steered clear of anything too controversial.


But last week I was looking through some of our stats to see which cartoons had the most page views, and to my surprise, pretty much all of the most popular ones had some topical element to them.  Which means my new philosophy here is that while I'm not going to seek out controversy simply for shock value, I'm not going to be quite as gun-shy about doing that kind of material if it suggests itself.


Now, don't expect "Minions at Work" to turn into "Doonesbury."  My preference is still for irreverent and absurdest humor and for pop-culture references rather than political ones.  But you may see a few more topical cartoons now and then, especially as we head into the election (which has already reached off-the-chart levels of insanity).  And know that as always, we will always lampoon real-life's lesser-evils where ever we see them.


It was in this spirit that I was inspired to throw together a new Overlord this week, "Doctor Wallstreet."  Really, in retrospect, I should have had a character to dig into Wall Street and corporate greed a long time ago.  I have a family member who used to work in the legal department of a brokerage firm, and then quit in large part because they couldn't stomach the ethics of what was going on there.  This was a long time before the economic collapse or the bail-outs started, so this has been on my radar for a quite a while.


Normally, when I make a new character, they sit around the studio here for a while as I figure out who and what they are before featuring them in a cartoon.  But this time I felt I was already so late to the party, Doctor Wallstreet got shoved out there pretty much as soon as I'd put him together.

So I don't really know what his back-story is yet.  All we know is, he's hideously scarred, wears a power suit with black gloves, and carries an aluminum brief-case.  At the moment, he's also wearing a riot-gear helmet and an assortment of tear-gas grenades, but his accessories may change as time goes by and those cease to be relevant.

I don't know how much we'll see of him.  Some villains like Doctor Coldblood, Doctor Funkystein, and Doctor Head-in-a-Jar show up all the time.  Others, like Cap'n Rehab, show up regularly but less often.  And others like Doctor Santa show up only a few times a year, or only as supporting characters or in Legion of Dread group shots.  Only the future will tell.  And past performance is no guarantee of future results! There.  The Legal Department told me I had to put that in.

See you guys back here next week!

          - Minimally Topical Minion Master, Steve
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Monday, March 12, 2012

Minions #311 - Spin Doctoring

Click for bigger PAC money!



Greetings, Fringe-groups and Core Constituencies!


Hey, we only occasionally get political here at Minions at Work.  But considering some of the clowns and nut-jobs who have managed to get themselves on the national radar this election season, you can't blame us for at least poking fun at the process.  Especially not the part where the candidate, who appeals only to a loyal base consisting only of one-eyed, one-armed, left-handed neo-Nazi, anime-loving, poodle breeders, and who sends everyone else screaming for the exits, is "rebranded" in an attempt to appeal to a broader audience.


Let's face it folks, the old saying is true: you can't make a silk-purse out of a genetically engineered dinosaur-man, no matter what color Kool-aid you make him drink.


Just sayin.'


See you guys back here next week!


                       - Muddled Message Minion Master Steve




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Monday, March 05, 2012

Minions #310 - Pay Per View

Click Cartoon for Greater Enlightenment



Greetings, Seekers and Suckers!


Occasionally we must all pay the price of Minion enlightenment, so I'm pleased to announce that Mrs. Minion Master (writing under her pen-name of Christy Fifield) has a new mystery novel coming out in trade paperback and ebook tomorrow (Monday, March 6th, 2012) from the fine folks at Berkley Prime Crime.  It's called "Murder Buys a T-Shirt," and it's the first in a new series of mysteries set in the Florida Panhandle, and set in a -- wait for it -- haunted souvenir shop!  Yes, there are dead bodies, tacky post-cards, clue-delivering ghosts, and a foul-mouthed parrot that will make you laugh out loud!  Surely you or some mystery lover you know will enjoy it!  Make it happen!

Better yet, make it happen in the first couple days of release, when even a small spike in numbers can really help a book's long-term success!

Why?  Because the Minions need support to keep up our evil activities, and whatever Mrs. Minion Master makes is community property!  Half of that cash is mine, baby!  We're EVIL dammit!

So order a copy right now on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Powell's Books, your favorite local bookseller, or on your favorite device! Do it now!  Your Minion Master commands it!

See you next week!

        - Minion Shillmaster Steve


Support starving Minions in Lair-land! Your donations support Minions at Work!