Minions #69/70 - 4th of July Double Feature

Click on cartoons for full-sized versions.

Stay tuned for an important (okay, not so much) message from your Minion Master, following the usual crass commercialism.

Check the sidebar to your right for our video trailer! A cool way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20&eurl=&v3



Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where 'service' is our middle name according to our false-ID."

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A big blow of the ballast tanks from the Minion Master:

Greetings, Scurvy Crew. Welcome to Under the Sea Month, Maties!


Yes, it's the 4th of July week (Independence Day, for our non-U.S. friends), traditional time for all-manner of evil plots to be launched, and for the likes of Michael Bay and John McClane to kick evil's butt. In other words, it's a great month for a Minion to lay low. So we bring you, Minions Under the Sea Month!

Okay, I really hadn't intended to do a double-feature this week. Actually, I'm trying to build up inventory so I can coast through July, which is vacation and San Diego Comicon month. But the first in this series was "how to be a Minion #3," and I hadn't yet run "how to be a Minion #2," so I had to clear the tubes, so-to-speak. (By the way, the first in the "How to Be a Minion" series appeared way back in Minions #11, if you need a refresher.)


So stay tuned in the coming weeks, as we introduce new sets, a new Evil Overlord, and maybe one of the funniest panels ever. (Be warned, however, that we'll be traveling and busy through the end of the month, so things may occasionally post late or early, depending.)

-Steve

Minions #68 - Lab Animals

Stay tuned for an important (okay, not so much) message from your Minion Master, following the usual crass commercialism.

Check the sidebar to your right for our video trailer! A cool way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20&eurl=&v3



Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where 'service' is our middle name according to our false-ID."

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

An experimental jolt from the Minion Master:

Greetings, Subjects of my On-Going Experiment,


First, here are the results of our latest poll over on the Weekly Reminder List web-site. Didn't get to vote? Join today! I'm posting a new fun poll in the next day or two...

POLL QUESTION: If you were an evil Overlord, which evil plan would you put into motion?

CHOICES AND RESULTS
- Threaten to destroy world unless you are featured on next season of "The Surreal Life." - 0.00%
- Release flesh-eating zombies to promote a healthy vegan lifestyle. - 3.57%
- Crash Moon into Earth, use new real-estate to build housing developments and big-box stores. - 7.14%
- Plan? I got this smokin' lair. I got beer. Par-tay! - 14.29%
- Hold world's entire supply of Krispy-Kremes for ransom. Then when they pay, laugh maniacally and tell them you ate them yourself. - 14.29%
- Create computer virus to disable cell-phones in traffic and in theaters. (Wait, you said I was EVIL?) - 17.86%
- Speed up global warming, and eliminate Florida as a factor in the next election. - 17.86%

And the winner!

- Bring back dinosaurs, and save money on gas by riding T-Rex to work. - 25.00%

Thanks for participating.

One more bit of fun: If you haven't already, check the previous post for a link to a fun video. It's not mine, but it IS Minionmobile related.

Since then, I've found another video to share, and this one earns the guy who made it, Vernon Barry, our...

EVIL GENIUS OF THE WEEK AWARD

Vernon has put an actual turbine engine into a golf cart and made it work! Even better, he got all the parts off Ebay for a song. Vernon, once you have your plan for world domination worked out and your lair all set up, give us a call. Here's the video.


That's all for this week. See you next time...

-Steve, Man O' Minions

How to be a Minion extra: How not to board the Minionmobile

I just stumbled on this video and couldn't resist sharing. (Note: you may see a "mature content" warning when you try to view this, but I didn't see anything that remotely qualifies. The guy in this video would would be justified in some four-letter words, but they aren't here. Maybe after. :-)

Now not to board the Minionmobile Video

Minions #67 - Hard Liquor

Stay tuned for an important (okay, not so much) message from your Minion Master, following the usual crass commercialism.

Check the sidebar to your right for our video trailer! A cool way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20&eurl=&v3


Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"Where 'service' is our middle name according to our false-ID."

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A Happy-hour Howdy from the Minion Master:

Greetings, Bar-flies of Badness,


Well, there you go. Never say I don't listen to you and give you what you want (those of you cool enough to be part of our Weekly Reminder Email List anyway). You guys like the Bartender so we finally get a line of dialog from him, and a little more back-story. How did he become a Minion? How did he UN-become a Minion? Only time will tell...

It's shaping up to be another busy summer, with travel, family business to deal with, and now it looks like we'll be putting in a one-day (Saturday) appearance at the San Diego Comicon. My wife, Chris is up for the first IAMTW (International Association of Media Tie-in Writers) Scribe Award in the young-adult category for her Alias novel "A Touch of Death." If you're there, drop by the awards/media-tie-in discussion panel to cheer her on.

It's also nice to see that the Minions at Work video trailer is up to almost 1500 views on YouTube, despite a total lack of promotion (other than you guys), more than my "Governator" video has gotten in a year. We're also seeing a trickle of new members on the reminder list. All of which suggests that making a few videos as promotion may be worth the trouble. So expect to see more when I get around to it.

Oh, and check the bottom of the page for the new, more colorful "Minions at Work" logo that I'm trying out. Let me know what you think. I'm still debating about moving it to the top of the page...


Oh, and one more bit of self-promotion. Here's the new "cover" art for our upcoming Star Trek the Next Generation Ebook (first in the five-book series, "Slings and Arrows") titled "A Sea of Troubles." The series fills in much of the one-year (Star Trek time) gap between the end of "Star Trek: Generations" and "Star Trek: First Contact," and our book deals with the Enterprise E being infiltrated by a Changeling spy just as its shakedown cruise takes it into a dangerous planetary nebula. It will be out later this year, as will the trade paperback reprint of our "Star Trek Corps of Engineers" ebook, "Spin." You can find more info on my writing blog, here.

See you all back here at the lair next week...

-Steve

Minions #66 - Hot Seat

Click image for full-sized version.












(Stay tuned for an important message from your Minion Master, following the usual crass commercialism.)

Check the sidebar to your right for our video trailer! A cool way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A stern reprimand from the Minion Master:

Greetings, Sitting Ducks,


Running a little late this week. I had a non-fiction book proposal to finish up last night and didn't get done until the wee hours, nor out of bed till noon today.

Those of you not on our email reminder list (see above) have been missing out on some fun stuff. The reminder list has its own exclusive web page with goodies such as file downloads, photo galleries, and -- polls. We just closed a poll on the list's favorite Minions at Work character, and here are the results:

POLL QUESTION: Who is your favorite Minions at Work character?

CHOICES AND RESULTS
- No. 1 - The backwards-hat leader, 30.43%
- Number Two - The wise-cracking, big-nose, gas-mask guy, 13.04%
- Number Nine - (the black guy) He's a lover, not a fighter, 8.70%
- Number Ten - (the camo helmet guy) He's a fighter, not a lover, 0.00%
- Number 67 - The female Minion, 4.35%
- Rookie - The clueless flat gasmask guy with the snorkle, 8.70%
- Penguin, 13.04%
- Doctor Coldblood - Evil reptile overlord, 4.35%
- Gondor McKomb - Suited bureaucrat, a minion of a different kind, 0.00%
- The Bartender - Evil master of mixacology with a mysterious past, 8.70%
- Dragon Lady - Beautiful Asian barfly, also mysterious, 8.70%


So, what does it all mean? Well, it's hardly a scientific poll, and it isn't a big sample. Most of you aren't on the reminder list, and only about half of those who are voted. I also set up the poll so you could only vote for one favorite. It might have come out quite differently if I'd allowed multiple choices. Still...

Not a huge surprise that our fearless leader No. 1 is the most popular character, of only because he's the most visible and recognizable. But he was slow out of the gate, with several characters beating him in early voting.

I'm maybe surprised that not more people voted for Number Two. Our self-centered lay-about is one of my personal favorite characters.

But people do love the Penguin. No surprise that he's a break-out character. Penguins are hot, and how can you not love a Penguin in a crash helmet?

One surprise is that anybody voted for the bartender, much less that he did as well as he did. He's never been the focus of a panel, never had a line. He's just there, looking cool in his Hawaiian shirt and mixing a mean martini or two. But I'm glad, as I do have a back-story in mind for him that ties him more closely to the Minions than you'd imagine, and we'll get around to doing more with him one of these days.

On the other hand, nobody voted for poor Gondor McKomb, and he's been more center stage than the bartender in several panels. Go figure.

And poor Number 10. Also unloved. Too violent I guess.

Anyway, we'll do this poll again in a while. Hopefully more of you will sign up for the list, and by then you'll probably have seen more of our supporting characters, and can better form an opinion about them.

But that doesn't mean the poll fun is over. Our next poll (already underway) allows you to chose which of a list of evil plans you'd carry out if you were an overlord. We'll announce the results here in a few weeks. Sign up for the list now so you can join the fun!

See you next time.

- Steve

Minions #65 - Advance Warning

Click image for full-sized version.


Check the sidebar to your right for our video trailer! A cool way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A little something extra in your pay envelope from the Minion Master:

Greetings, wage-slaves,


More workplace humor this week. As it happens, Minion-mistress Chris is an accountant (currently the assistant-controller at a resort hotel). She doesn't do payroll any more, but she used to, and I still remember all the stories. Anyway, a shout-out to her co-workers at the accounting department. They all know who they are.

The "attack accountant" sign in this cartoon is actual a refrigerator magnet I bought for Chris a while back. I borrowed it back for the photo shoot, but it normally lives in her kitchen, and a larger version is on her office door at work.

Anyway, that's it for this week. Share the link (especially with your accounting friends).

See you next time.

- Overtime Overlord, Steve

Minions #63/#64 - Memorial Day Double!

Be sure to continue down for this week's BONUS Minions at Work cartoon!

Click image for full-sized version.
Check the sidebar to your right for our new video trailer! A new way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Service with a smile! (Hey! He's wearing a gas-mask. Can you prove he isn't smiling?)

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A big second-helping from the Lair's barbecue:

"Greetings, Minions off work..."


I hope you're having a good holiday weekend safe with friends and family, a last moment of domestic bliss before our plan of world domination is set in motion. Okay, not so much. Even the Overlords are taking the day off today.

But lets not forget the thousands of U.S. servicemen and women who don't know what a day off is lately, and a "day-on" means a full schedule of danger and adversity. I don't know if you guys are out there (what with the Pentagon pulling the plugs on so many sites on the questionable name of "bandwidth"), we love you guys, and want you all home safe ASAP. Keep your heads down, and we'll keep a steak in the freezer for when you get stateside.

Now, on the the usual Minions madness. Actually, it's unusual Minion madness, in that we're offering a double-dose of toons this week. Why? Well, it's the tradition of business to have special sales and clear out some overstock merchandise over the long weekend, and we're no different. Yup, I've found a Minions panel that's been hanging around the warehouse too long, and so I'm going to bend over backwards to make you a deal! Yes, two, TWO Minions cartoons for the price of one, and the price of one is FREE! Yes, friends, it doesn't get any better than that!

Oh, sure, you could reward out generosity by sharing "Minions at Work" with a friend, or by buying something from one of our Cafe Press shops, or buying one of our many books in print. But we wouldn't want to make you feel guilty or anything.

Not us.

Guilty.

Guilty, guilty, guilty!

No.

Hey, anyway, hope I didn't get anybody down with last week's "layoff" theme. Being a Minion is about laughing in the face of adversity, and from what I hear, the workplace can sometimes be pretty adverse.

On another matter, if you aren't currently a member of our Minions at Work weekly reminder mailing list, then you can't vote in our "Favorite Minions Character" poll (of which I'm going to announce the results next week). Yep, the list has its own web page with polls, exclusive photo albums, behind-the-scenes goodies, and other exclusive content. Plus, you'll get a weekly notice in your mailbox to remind you about the latest Minions at Work cartoon posting. Never miss a cartoon. Don't miss the fun. Sign up today.


Well, we've strung you along quite enough. Enjoy our warehouse blowout, overstock, showroom sample, factory-second, mismatched-set, holiday bonus cartoon:

Minions #62 - Mismanagement Meeting

Click image for full-sized version.
Check the sidebar to your right for our new video trailer! A new way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

Please report to the briefing room for an important message from the Minion Master:

"Good news everybody! Some of you won't be getting pay cuts! You'll be unemployed!"


Things have been a bit silly here lately, so I decided it was high time to put away the fart-jokes for a bit and get back to the workplace humor that I see as the core of the strip.

I confess, I like this one a lot. I think all of us have been in this moment, when you're feeling good about a place your working, and then it all turns bad, and you suddenly get that sick feeling in your stomach when you realize that the captain of you little ship of industry and/or commerce doesn't have a clue what they're doing.

And really, there's nothing more embarrassing than realizing that they person in charge of a company doesn't even have a clue what the company even does. "We're not selling septic-tank clean-outs people, we're selling smiles and a warm handshake." Yeah, just not clear on the concept.

(Whoops, almost got back to fart-joke territory there, but you know what I mean.)

Hey, you guys can help me out here. Since I'm not currently a wage slave, I'd love to hear your work stories, your idiot boss stories, your idiot customer stories, your idiot co-worker stories, and the things that go on around you that you just can't believe. Anything that might inspire a good "Minions at Work" cartoon. You can send them as feedback, or if you prefer to be more private about it, send it email. I'd love to hear from you.

Till next week, keep passing the links.

- Steve

Minions #61 - Secret Ingredient

Click image for full-sized version.
Check the sidebar to your right for our new video trailer! A new way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A Chemically Altered Message from Minion Central:

Greetings, All You Kings of Disco, you Queens of Funk,


Please put your hands together and give a big Minions at Work welcome to our new Overlord, Doctor Funkeystein (and his hunchbacked assistant Willie)! Doctor Funkestein reminds you not to confuse him with funk-disco great George Clinton, aka "Dr. Funkenstein. Explains Doc, "Dr. Funkenstein is a musical genius. I am just a genius who is musical." Maybe his "musical" nature is why the doc is always trying to mix up a more powerful alternative to Beano.

Doc is your basic mad-scientist, and likes to keep things old-school. I expect we'll see more of Doc and Willie as time goes on.

Sincerely,
- It's a Mad, Mad, Mad Steve

Minions #60 - Evil Defined

Click image for full-sized version.
Check the sidebar to your right for our new video trailer! A new way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A Message from Minion Central:

Greetings, Janitorial Judges,


Okay, sometimes we go for the cheap joke, but we're working on "I Was a Teen-aged Minion" right now, and young adult is not shy with the bathroom humor. Deal.

And hey, thanks to any of you who may have been responsible for some of the nice comments and ratings we've gotten on the Minions at Work video trailer. We're not exactly getting mentioned on Letterman yet, but we're off to a reasonable start. Hopefully it will get "discovered" over time. Meanwhile, I've got some ideas for another near-term Minions video project (a different sort of trailer, actually), so maybe there will be more as time goes on (especially if there are requests).

See you next week.

- Steve

Minions #59 - Survival Instinct

Check the sidebar to your right for our new video trailer! A new way to introduce your friends to the Minions! Send them here, or link directly to it on YouTube at the following URL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDpDiP_LB20


Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A Big Blast of Global Warming from Minion Central:

Greetings, Endangered Ones,


I'm a big fan of the absurd, so this week's cartoon is one of my favorites. I don't know how you'll react, but it makes me laugh. Note too our not-so-evil plug for you to read up on real-life penguin conservation, and find out what you can do to help our fine feathered fiends -- er -- friends. To save you the effort of typing in the link from the cartoon, get your penguin info by clicking here.

You know, there's some irony here. Our evil overlord Dr. Coldblood wants to use global warming to set the stage for the return of the dinosaurs. Yet, an ever-growing body of scientific evidence supports that penguins (and other birds) are dinosaurs, or at least their more sophisticated descendants. Doctor Coldblood really needs to watch more Animal Planet.

On a more mercenary note, I've now added an assortment of black and dark colored "I've Got Evil in my Pants" tee-shirts to Number Two's House of Naughty. I'll be doing the same at the Lair of Merchandise soon, but I still have a few more graphics to redo.

Hope you enjoy the video trailer. Please post your comments and ratings on YouTube, and pass it along to your friends. I don't think this is our last or most ambitious step into the world of video, so depending on the response, I hope we can do it again soon. I've already been lining up some voice talent who might handle actual Minion dialog in some hypothetical future installment.

Anyway, I'm outta here. I'm trying to build up my inventory of Minions at Work cartoons, so I already have some neat things waiting in the wings, with more to come. Keep checking back, and don't miss a thing!

- Steve (Stockpiling Weapons of Mass Hilarity)

Minions #58 - Blue Collar in Black and White

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

An after-work Martini-gram from from Minion Central:

Greetings, Real Minions,


As you may have noted, we had some problems with the images in our Cafe Press stores last week, but they were fixed over the weekend and everything seems to be back in order.

This marks the second appearance of the "other-Minions." Our guys last ran into them in this very same bar back in Minions #25. So I started to wonder, "who are these guys?" Now, maybe they just work for some other overlord, but our guys get around, and something about those yellow helmets and translucent sleeves somehow suggested that they were dedicated techies of some sort. And given that, could there be some friction with our work-a-day Minions? Quite possibly. I'll bet these guys have quite a rivalry when they play softball at the company picnic...

Anyway, I doubt this is the last you'll see of these guys. Since, in the novel I'm working on, I've dubbed our original Minions "White Team," then let's call these guys "Blue Team."

(By the way, does anybody else think that Mike Rowe of Discovery Channel's program Dirty Jobs really needs to hook up with the Minions?)


See you next week...

- Steve, Master of Multiple Minions

Overlord Update

Hot off the wires:

A nice review of "If I Were an Evil Overlord" in general (look to the sidebar for a picture of the cover), and my story in particular. Find it here.

-Steve, Overlord Tech-writer

Minions #57 - Lost

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(It's only as bad as you think it is!)

Join the Minions reminder email list or we will blot out the sun*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin to stalk you with a big, black, umbrella. Budget-cuts and all...

A Looking for Evil in all the wrong places missive from Minion Central:

Greetings, Lost Sheep of Lawfulness,


This is our second-ever Minions cartoon with no caption, the previous one being #45, Uncivil Disobedience, in case you'd care to revisit it.

Hey, folks, I know you're out there. I can hear you breathing! Drop me a comment here, good bad or indifferent. I get quite a bit of email, which is fine if you have something you want to say privately, but having comments on the blog gives it a nice, lived-in look that keeps me happy and making new Minions cartoons! Doesn't have to be long or eloquent. A simple "Ha!" or "Huh?" is fine with me. Just post!


Minor public relations moment for those of you who may be in the UK. My wife Chris's second novel based on the cult-favorite ALIAS TV series, "A Touch of Death," is being released this month there by Simon and Schuster UK. In fact, Amazon UK lists it as being available now! And of course, those of you on this side of the pond can still buy the U.S. edition as well.

See you next week.

- Steve: Lonely as Hell at the Top of the Lair

Minions #56 - Shrinkage

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Shoplifters cheerfully disintegrated!

Join the Minions reminder email list or the penguin gets it!*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, the penguin always gets it, usually well before we do. He's got an IQ of 210 after all...

A Tower of Truth (evil truth) from Minion Central:

Greetings, Followers of feloniousness,


Spring is sprung, so it seemed appropriate to take the Minions outside. Well, actually, it was raining here, but luckily we had some outdoor shots from last summer just awaiting editing and a good caption. I do hope to get the Minions out on location a time or two this spring and summer though, when the weather permits.

Hey, don't forget to check our sidebar (that's over to the side of your screen there), as I'll try to add at least some new bit of fun and amusement every week. It may be subtle, and it may not happen on Monday at the same time as the new cartoon, but it will be there...

See y'all next week.

- The Stevemeister

Minions #55 - One Up

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Looking is free - at least until we can find a way to charge for it.

Join the Minions reminder email list or the penguin gets it!*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, the penguin always gets it, usually well before we do. He's got an IQ of 210 after all...

A long, cool, drink of water from Minion Central:

Greetings, Patrons of Perpetration,


This is, more or less, the one year anniversary of "Minions at Work." My first cartoon post on the original "Minions for Hire" was April 7th of last year (the Minions first appeared on some GI Joe collecting web sites a bit before that). Bah! Where's my cake! I wanted cake!

The Minions, meanwhile have returned to the bar for a little Minion refreshment. I'd say they were celebrating their birthday, but to be honest, they don't need an excuse.

Meanwhile, I slave away at the keyboard finishing my Star Trek project. I did, however, give up some break time to finish opening our second Cafe Press store, Number 2's House of Naughty, featuring items inspired by last week's "There's Evil in My Pants" cartoon. Actually, these things are only really naughty if you have a dirty mind, and that couldn't possibly apply to you, could it?



Anyway, if you should, for some reason that escapes me, wish to proclaim that you have evil in your pants, you'll find a whole variety of shirts, hats, bumper stickers, and yeah, even undies to help you out in that area -- in adult sizes only, of course (though, as any parent can tell you, there is a certain inescapable logic in doing an infant/toddler size as well.)

I haven't installed a link for this in the sidebar, so again, here's the link.

See you next week,

- Steve, Evil Shopkeeper

Minions #54 - Troubled Waters

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Looking is free - at least until we can find a way to charge for it.

Join the Minions reminder email list or the penguin gets it!*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, the penguin always gets it, usually well before we do. He's got an IQ of 210 after all...

A poisoned candygram from Minion Central:

Greetings, Minions and Wimmons,


Hey, is that a bridge over something? Not water, actually. Didn't use a drop in making this week's cartoon. No, it's not heavy photoshop either (though I did some touch-up). It's magic, baby! Love that magic!

Enough talk. Busy. Deadlines. Must go. Next week. Bye.

- JSY

Minions #53 - Things Change

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Looking is free - at least until we can find a way to charge for it.

A Missive from your friendly Overlord:

Greetings, Maxi-Minions,

What can I say about this week's cartoon. Sometimes, a plan just comes together. Sometimes we have a prop in search of a punch-line. Sometimes we have a punch-line in search of a prop. But in this case, we had a punch-line, and the prop practically built itself and homed in on the punch-line like a joke-seeking missile. (What a fiendish plan. We've got to work on that!)

I remind you that that the new anthology "If I Were an Evil Overlord" is not available in your favorite store or bookseller. You'll find the link to the right to buy it from BarnesandNobel.com, but if you're the type who prefers to buy through Amazon, use this link. And stay tuned following my usual ramblings for an excerpt from my story in said book, titled "Gordie Culligan vs. Dr. Longbeach and the HVAC of Doom."

Beyond that the usual. Spread the word. Blah, blah. Buy the shirts. Blah, blah. Join the reminder list. Blah, blah. And if you check the sidebar, you'll see that, in another desperate attempt to make this evil venture profitable (or at least, not so much of a money pit) I'm experiment with "Google Adsense" advertising. Check it out, and if you should choose to click through to visit our sponsors, some billionth of a cent will be sent in my direction.

Keep in mind, I have no control or idea what ads will appear on the site. Supposedly, they'll be automatically chosen to tie into the content of our humble site. Given what we do here, it may be highly entertaining (and possibly frightening) to see what sorts of ads will appear as the robots zero in on us. (Which is a good evil plan. I've got to work on that!)

This is just an experiment, and as always, your input is welcome. Feel free to drop a comment on the site or send me an email.

And now, onto an excerpt from my story in "If I Were an Evil Overlord." Keep in mind, this excerpt is taken from my unedited manuscript, not the final book copy. Any typos or errors are caused entirely by the internet... Okay, I might have had something to do with it too.

---

I tell you, when I answered that ad in the back of Popular Mechanics long ago, I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. Sure, I expected steady work, good pay, excellent benefits, and the respect and admiration of my friends and family. That goes without saying.
But I never expected the intrigue, the danger, the adventure!

My name is Gordie Culligan, and I’m the man from HVAC. That’s Heating, Ventilation and Air-Conditioning to you. God, I love the smell of a fried starter-capacitor in morning!

It was a day like any other day in the Los Angeles basin, but I felt something in the air. Possibly it was the unusual number of ominous, glowing, saucer-shaped clouds moving against the wind, or the swarms of atomic, robot bats flapping their way east over Burbank, or the unusual number of electric dirigibles, blue arcs of lighting crackling between their protruding electrodes, that circled over the San Diego freeway. Maybe it was just the greenish tinge to the smog. But I knew something was up.

Now sure, I know if you don’t live in LA, you’d consider any one of those things cause for alarm, but that’s why you live where you live, and I live in the greatest city in the world.

Sure, it was a little startling at first, but this is LA, baby! You live here for a while, you see things like this every day, and nothing ever, ever comes of it, you just start to take it for granted. Sure, there are giant robots in Tarzana and giant beetles in Griffith Park, but when you’ve had Conan for a governor, nothing is that strange any more.

By now, you’re probably saying, “Gordie, this is all very interesting and all, but what about the air-conditioning?” See it all ties in, and until recently, I didn’t know that. You see all those crazy things, and you take it for granted that nothing ever happens. By you know why nothing ever happens?

Because of guys like me, that’s why. HVAC saves the world, baby! That’s what this town is about!

(Continued in "If I Were an Evil Overlord.")

---

Now get to the bookstore! Dang, I'm evil.

See you next week.

-Steve, Overlord in residence

Minions #52 - Immigrant labor

Click image for full-sized version.

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Looking is free - at least until we can find a way to charge for it. We're evil, darn it!

Join the Minions reminder email list or the penguin gets it!*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, the penguin always gets it, usually well before we do. He's got an IQ of 210 after all...

Notes from the Minion Master:

Greetings Minionoids,

Advice of the day: Be careful what you wish for...


Brag of the day: Remember a while back when we gave away a signed copy of my wife Chris' ALIAS tie-in novel, A Touch of Death? Well, it's a nominee for the 2006 IAMTW Scribe Awards, in the catagory of
Best Young Adult Novel (All Genres), which will be awarded at this year's San Diego Comicon. Big congrats to Chris!.

Just a reminder, if you order a Minions shirt or other item, be sure to send us your pictures of you wearing or using your items. We'll post them here on the site. Just to get you rolling, here are a couple shots of our model Zoe. (our kinda, sorta, almost granddaughter who we're crazy about. Familial relationships are complicated in the 21st century.)

She's wearing our "Infant/Toddler Evil Nature T-Shirt." I'm promised some pictures from the back, eventually, which reads (of course) "Evil is not my nature. Evil is just my day job." At only $9.99, it's a great conversation piece, and will give your toddler the fear and respect they deserve. Why have rug-rats, when you can have little Minions?

I've also had some requests for new items. First of all, Black shirts. Yes, I want these too, but I have to redo my art for the new shirts, and just haven't gotten around to it yet. Soon. When I do, maybe I'll also do some red shirts. Mainly around here, we're about the black and the white, but red-shirts are kind of Minions of good. You know what happens to red-shirts don't you?


Also, I had a (gulp!) request for a Minions thong. Well, okay, we try to please. I've just added an "evil nature" thong to the store, at least on a trial basis. Okay, if you send me thong pictures, we are not posting them on the site!

But since I want to be sure the store is considered family/office friendly, maybe I'll start up a separate shop for undies and such at some point. "Number 2's House of Naughty" has a nice ring to it.

Well, that's all for this week. As always, share with your friends, and never let the Overlords catch you napping...

- Steve, Minion Underlord.

Minions #51 - Frequent Flier

Visit:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
Looking is free - at least until we can find a way to charge for it. We're evil, darn it!

I Can Make You Famous!
Well, for about 15 seconds anyway, which according to Andy Warhol, gives you a remaining lifetime quota of 14 minutes and 45 seconds to save for a rainy day. After all, why blow it all at once by, say, getting out of a limousine without any underwear? Make it last! Simply buy a Minions shirt from our Lair of Merchandise today, and send us a picture of you (or your child, or your dog, or your killer cyborg from the future) wearing it, and we'll post it here for your fellow Minions Lovers to enjoy. Or better yet, buy a shirt once a year, send us a new picture, and enjoy fame through (if not throughout) the next 60 years! Such a deal! (Disclaimer: We reserve the right to edit or exclude pictures in such bad taste that even we won't touch them, or that or unsuitable for family viewing. Not to say that we won't keep our own private gallery here at the lair, mind you. We're evil, darn it!)


Join the Minions reminder email list or the penguin gets it!*. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!)

*Actually, the penguin always gets it, usually well before we do. He's got an IQ of 210 after all...

Notes from the Minion Master:
Still buried here at Minions Central. Our bathroom remodel, which was supposed to take place in two stages weeks apart all happened at once, as our tile guy had a hole open up in his schedule. Also, my first day of jury-duty Thursday (no, they didn't actually put me on a jury). So the bad news is a week of work-disaster for this privacy-craving ("...who dares enter the lair of Doctor Anti-social!") Overlord. Good news is, I still managed to come up with a new Minions at Work in the ta-da nick of time. (And you thought only the good-guys could manage that!)