Minions #77 - Great 80s Hero

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Don't miss the latest ravings of a lunatic madman, your Minion Master, following the usual annoying noise...

While waiting for your impending doom, shop:
THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE
"If you're not 100% satisfied, then the beatings will begin!"

and

NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY
(Oh, come on. You know you want to be naughty!)

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*Actually, we're just going to send the Penguin in a red-white-and-blue tie. We don't have the heart to tell him that he finished last in the Iowa straw poll. (Do you? Man, you ARE evil!)

Yet another knock from the great fist of leadership:

Greetings, Door-to-door Voyeurs,




Sometimes you just know a cartoon is going to work. Sometimes you don't, especially when knowledge of the punch-line may depend on knowledge of some pop-culture reference best known to persons of a - eehum - certain age. So just in case you're too young (or maybe just not American enough) to understand...

Once upon a time, back in the early 80s, there was a cult-favorite TV show in the United States called the Greatest American Hero. It told the ongoing story of Ralph, a good-hearted dweeb of a school-teacher who was abducted by a UFO and given a magic set of space jammies which granted the wearer super-powers. The trouble being, Ralph lost the instruction book that came with it, and so had to figure out how the suit worked pretty much by trial and error.

For example, he discovered pretty early that the suit would allow him to fly, but during the entire course of the series, he only partially mastered it. In fact, his first flying lesson came from a little boy who, watching him unsuccessfully try to take off, explained that he had to put his arms up, take a couple steps, and jump. Unfortunately, the kid didn't explain how to land, and so for much of the show's run, this usually consisted of crashing into a wall or some garbage cans. At first his powers seemed to closely resemble those of Superman, but perhaps because DC Comics' lawyers complained, he developed other non-Kryptonian powers like invisibility.

It was actually a great little show, as Ralph (with the help of his lawyer girlfriend and a right-wing, paranoid, possibly loony, FBI agent bumbled his way through righting wrongs, fighting crime, and eventually, saving the world.

But my-God, that suit, and that perm!


So, like Ralph, I stumbled on this suit, and it just screamed "Greatest American Hero" to me. In no time, I'd found a doll head with bad hair, popped it onto an action figure, added some moon-boots for a little extra retro-kitsch, and the rest is history (or maybe, infamy, if you didn't think it was funny).

So now, if you didn't before, you understand the punch line. But I am all too aware, if you have to explain it, it ain't funny.

Tell me it's at least evil...

- Steve