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Stand by, following the usual coach-class accommodations for a business-class upgrade from your Minion Master!
Your interminable wait is important to us. To serve you better, a supervisor may feed the representative assigned to serve you to the crab parasites just before they can answer your call. It's just one more way of saying, "we care, just not about you."
While waiting for your impending doom, pick up a Minions at Work tee-shirt or other great souvenir of your visit to the Lair: THE MINION'S LAIR OF MERCHANDISE "Satisfaction guaranteed or we'll make make you buy something else!" and NUMBER TWO'S HOUSE OF NAUGHTY (For very small values of naughty.) Or just click on our "Donate" button and send us cash add to our "Buy the Minions a Camera Fund!" 100% of your contribution goes to allow starving orphans to buy blankets for kittens. Nah, not really, it all goes to ME, in order to further the cause of EVIL, and the photography thereof.
Join the Minions Reminder Email List. It's free, it's easy, and you'll never miss a Minions at Work cartoon (or if you do, it won't be our fault!) Or become one of our followers. See the follower box in our Mighty Sidebar! Or join our "Minions at Work" group on Facebook. And yes, I'm finally on Twitter. Follow me. I'm JSteveYork there (clicking on the previous link will take you straight to my profile page.) Eventually I'm getting No. 1 his own account for Minions-related-business, but one thing at a time. Still: We're everywhere! We're everywhere!
Greetings, Seat Swappers!
Well, it's post-Comicon, and we're exhausted! Actually, we didn't go this year, but it's STILL exhausting, just keeping up with all the posts on news sites. This year's stabbing (such as it is) reminds us why we stopped going, despite all the cool stuff that goes on there. Yes, it's amazing. Yes, you should go (at least once). Yes, you should hurry up and do it while you're young enough and indestructible enough to enjoy it.
But nobody really goes to Comicon any more. It's too crowded.
We've had a devil of a time getting this week's cartoon posted. Out power has been blipping out for just a second at a time. Trouble is, it's been doing it for three days, and sometimes as often as every 20 minutes. Every time it goes, my desktop computer goes down as well, and that's where I do all my Minions work.
You say, "Steve, don't you have a UPS on that thing?" Well, I was going to say that I do, but it doesn't work. The local power grid chews them up and spits them out in about three months. But do I really need to explain? I mean, what evil lair has EVER had working emergency equipment? No, it's pretty much twist a large, colorful, clearly labeled dial and the whole thing blows up. It's some kind of law of the universe.
Anyway, the power company is sympathetic, but they're reporting mysterious "salt build-ups" on the wires that have "never happened before," and "suddenly started happening this week, and we don't know why." Also, they say it has something to do with a "fog from the ocean."
Now, I'm I wrong here, or is this the first act of of a SyFy original movie?
Actually, I'd suspect some kind of evil plan against us, EXCEPT WE PRETTY MUCH ARE AN EVIL PLAN!" I suspect the forces of Good. Damn, those guys are getting sneaky...
- Minion Master Steve